~happiness~

Gem and I have been so, so happy lately. I don't even know why. I think we're just getting into a good rhythm, learning each other, figuring out what works and when to back off.

So far this week we have watched The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Gem's first time), had an impromptu dance party, watched a lot of Friends, done some crossword puzzles, snuggled on the couch, tried making enchiladas, spontaneously bought and made brownie sundaes, and laughed a TON.

I got a migraine Tuesday night, and while it sucked, it also ended up being kind of cool because I just laid there are visiting with God for like two hours. I had some cool revelations and just enjoyed praying.

I have never been this happy. Work isn't stressful right now, Gem and I are doing wonderfully, and working out is still going well. This weekend we have plans to watch Les Mis, go clubbing (!!!), have brunch with my aunt, and play Cards Against Humanity with Gem's brother and sister-in-law.

Easter is soon. That means Cadbury mini eggs and The Ten Commandments movie.

The weather is warming up.

I am just love, love, loving life. I don't feel like this much anymore. But maybe I will more now. I dunno. I'm so happy :)

I hope you're doing well, if you're reading this. I do miss the blogging community.

~Stephanie

A Small Breakdown

I had a small breakdown today.

My roommate and I went to see the play "Anne of Green Gables" this afternoon. I LOVED those movies as a kid. We have the entire movie series on VHS and I think I can probably still quote whole sections even though I haven't seen them in years.

Actually, before the play, I hadn't even THOUGHT about the story lately: the story of a little orphan girl with an unparalleled imagination, a big mouth, and dreams of authorship. I forgot how much Anne felt like childhood, felt like a legitimate part of MY identity, felt like home. Anne found a home in Green Gables, and I found my home today in her.

Suddenly I remembered how inspired I would get when I watched movies set in "olden days." I would start getting up at 7am and making my bed and eating an "old-fashioned" breakfasts and doing my chores right away and trying to wear dresses. I would make vows like ones Anne would make, about being a more conscientious person. I would try to be Polite and Well-Mannered and Hospitable.

Then my stomach started to sink with the startling realization that I am sort of grown up. There will not ever be another time when I can wake up and reinvent myself while my mom actually keeps my real life spinning. I actually DO have to get up at 7am and do my chores, because no one else is going to do them for me. I can't just lose myself in whatever pretend game I want anymore. I have to live my own, actual, real life.

And then--at the time it somehow seemed directly related to the above--I got really homesick. Lately I've been plagued by a gnawing feeling of homelessness. The couch and chair in my apartment living room are SINFULLY uncomfortable (the arms are bony, the leather seats stick to your skin, and the cushions come out the moment your ass touches them). My room is always messy because 1) it's small and 2) I never have the time or energy to keep it neat. Our kitchen sink is too shallow to wash dishes in and we don't have enough counter space to cook real food comfortably. My apartment does not feel like home.

But Gem's dorm is even worse. He's in your typical freshman dorm:  roommate, cinder block walls, loud AC unit, muggy as hell (the dehumidifier they just bought collects TWO GALLONS of water a day), and his bed is all the way lofted. You cannot sit up in bed at all. You're like 18 inches from the ceiling. It is like living in a prison cell. A humid, humid prison cell.

So, naturally, Home--my parents' house--is where my mind wistfully wandered.

Except that "Home" doesn't feel right anymore either. It has actually just started to feel like "my parents' house." Sure, it's familiar and the couch is comfy and the sink is deep and the counter space is fantastic and Mom's cooking is delicious and my room is clean (mostly because I don't live there anymore) and I can sit up in my bed, but...I don't know. It doesn't feel like a place where my soul is relaxed and snuggled up in a blanket anymore. It feels a little bit empty.

Although I'd give anything to be there now, of course. I really miss my family. I miss Mom's cooking and our inside jokes and her just "GETTING" me. I miss hearing Daddy's newest philosophical and political insights and going to the antique store with him and letting him show me his latest woodworking project. I haven't seen my sister in...a really long time. I don't even know when I saw her last. She pretty much just stays at college. She doesn't even respond to my texts, much less text me on her own.

But anyway. "Anne of Green Gables" made my heart and my throat ache with homesickness. And then my brain engaged and snorted at me:  Homesick? For where? Where is your home? And I didn't even know what to say.

My parents' house isn't Home anymore, and yet, I can't imagine feeling at home without my parents. This whole semester I've been excited to graduate and make my own "home": an apartment with all my books and my clothes and kitchen utensils where I cook food and watch TV and sleep and live real life. I've been so ready and so excited to make my own home.

But now I'm afraid that nowhere will ever feel like home, that I am incapable of creating "Home" by myself. I don't know how to do that. I'm afraid I'll always be a little homesick.

And I just started crying, right there in the play, right there in the dark theater house.

I'm not crying anymore, but I do feel lost and confused. What does Home really mean, anyway? Where Gem is? Where my books are? Where the damn couch cushions don't scoot out?

If I ever figure it out, I'm sure I'll let you know.

~Stephanie

Debunked: Omg The Lion King is Hamlet

Tomorrow night I am going to see a live-streamed version of the play Hamlet, starring Benedict Cumberbatch. Be jealous.

In honor of getting to see my favorite play of all time, I would like to address a popular myth that absolutely fries me. It is the myth of

"Omg The Lion King is totes a retelling of Hamlet"

I would like to unmask this ridiculous falsehood by replying

"Bitch no it is not"

And, of course, providing evidence to that effect. So here we go.

WARNING: SPOILERS. I assume you know the story of The Lion King and don't mind some ruined "surprises" in Hamlet, but I believe there is a special circle of Hell reserved for people who spoil stories, and I am all about not going to Hell. So proceed at your own risk.

Similarities Between Disney's The Lion King and William Shakespeare's Hamlet

1. Both stories revolve around royalty. Congratulations, you have identified two works that feature royal families. This is only like one of THE MOST common elements in literature, and basically the MAIN element in classic Disney.

2. In both stories, the uncles kill the fathers in order to take the crown for themselves. This is a much better parallel, but, again, it's a common theme in stories. The little brother who wants his big brother's crown is pretty much a classic plot line.

3. In both stories, the ghosts of the dead kings appear. This would be a pretty convincing similarity if their roles weren't vastly, vastly, fundamentally different. See Differences...

Differences Between The Lion King and William Shakespeare's Hamlet

1. In Hamlet, the Queen Gertrude is involved in plotting King Hamlet's murder; in The Lion King, Queen Sarabi is clueless and loyal to King Mufasa.

2. In Hamlet, the uncle and the queen get married--rather quickly. In The Lion King, Scar and Sarabi never seem to have a positive relationship.

3. In The Lion King, the uncle frames the son, Simba--and Simba DOES play a role in King Mufasa's death. Yeah, it was Scar who orchestrated the whole thing, but in Hamlet, the King's death is presumed to have been from natural causes. Hamlet isn't even implicated.

4. In Hamlet, Ophelia and Hamlet are discouraged from marrying. In The Lion King, Simba and Nala are betrothed.

5. In The Lion King, Simba genuinely feels guilty for his father's death and flees. In Hamlet, the son sticks around and actually develops an investigation plan. Yeah, Hamlet goes to England for like four seconds, but that is not his idea, and he comes back ASAP.

6. In Hamlet, the love interest, Ophelia, goes crazy and dies. In The Lion King, Nala is a feisty and persistent character who makes Simba man (lion?) up.

7. The secondary characters are all completely different. Pumba and Timone are on Simba's side; Rosencrantz and Guildenstern's job is basically to spy and tattle on Hamlet. Nala doesn't have a brother (Ophelia has Laertes). Nala's father isn't in the picture at all (Ophelia's father is adviser to the king). Simba doesn't have a strong confidante who actually survives the play (Horatio).

8. In Hamlet, there is no Rafiki character.

9. In The Lion King, the ghost of Mufasa appears to Simba to give him strength and hope. In Hamlet, the ghost of King Hamlet appears to Hamlet to demand vengeance. Mufasa encourages peace; King Hamlet brings unease and frustration.

10. In Hamlet, everybody dies at the end (I mean, it is a Shakespearean tragedy). In The Lion King, it is pretty much happily ever after for everyone except evil Uncle Scar (and the hyenas).

And there you have it.

So next time you hear people say "Omg The Lion King is Hamlet," please slap them for me. And then make them read this post.

Sincerely,
Such a Nerd

Guilt, Fifty Shades, and Valentine's Day {all unrelated, believe it or not}

Let me tell you a little something about myself (because after reading my thoughts for four years, you know nothing, of course):  When I feel bad about how long it's taking me to do something, I continue to not do it.

Examples:
- Justin texted me on February 11 asking if I was on campus because he was visiting. I was busy and didn't reply that day. I feel bad. So I still haven't replied.
- I have been working on a promotional piece for someone's website since the beginning of the year. She emailed me with some critique at the beginning of this month. I was swamped in schoolwork and didn't know what to do about it. So I temporarily ignored it. I feel bad. So I am still ignoring it.
- James wrote me a letter about ten months ago. It was amazingly great. I didn't write back right away. I felt bad. So I still haven't written back.
- I haven't blogged since Christmas Eve. I feel bad about it. So I've been not blogging.

Hi? *sheepish look*

{But I mean, in addition to all the guilty feels, I have also been swamped in homework and all the, like, not responding to other stuff, so...}

I also haven't had anything to say, besides life updates, which is kind of not what this blog was intended for, you know? It was supposed to be social commentary and life hacks and sort of pointless well-written pieces. It has mostly devolved into me alternately whining about school work and gushing about Gem.

Hey speaking of Gem. Doesn't he look like the world's most precious and endearing squirrel in this picture?

Yeah. But really, back off; he's mine.

I really wanted to post a response to all the commotion about "Fifty Shades of Grey" (Gray? Grey.), but...I dunno. It seemed pointless. People who hate it already know why they hate it. People who like it also know why people who hate it hate it. It's not really complicated. But if I were going to post about it, I would probably make these three points:

1) BDSM is not going to send you to Hell, so stop condemning people who like it rough. However, what is depicted in "Fifty Shades" isn't necessarily how "correct" BDSM is supposed to work. So. That's not good.
2) I have read a lot of "Fifty Shades," and it is an absolute disgrace to good writing. I am 100%, utterly, unreservedly certain that I can write better erotica than that. Hands down. Not even kidding. If it weren't immoral I would offer to send you proof. "Fifty Shades" completely disgusted me from an artistic standpoint. This is honestly what infuriates me the most about the whole thing. If someone ever writes an erotic novel that is good, I will review it and admit it. It can be done well--not MORALLY, but at least ARTISTICALLY. Which brings me to...
3) It's definitely porn. There is nothing classy or artistic about it, it is just straight up girl porn and not well done. See point two. Maybe if it were actually well-written it could at least be artistically valuable, but it's literary shit.

Alrighty. I am now dragging myself away from this topic. I don't think any more needs to be said from me. It would get ramble-y. {That being said, if you have questions or vehement disagreement or anything, I would be glad to listen and respond.}

Mmm. That's enough content for now. I really do have school work to do.

Here what else has been up, just btw.

Passion Conference 2015

I Turned 21

{I also went "out," of course, but there are not very good pictures from that.}

My suite mates threw me a surprise party when I got back :3 They are seriously the best.

I Celebrated My First "Real" Valentine's Day (i.e. with a boyfriend who did more than just text me "Happy V. Day" at some point during the 24-hour span)

We went to a local state park, which was gorgeous.

 

Then got cleaned up and headed to a restaurant, where we ate the best food I think I've ever had. Not even kidding. When we tried the chocolate lava cake dessert, we just lost it. Did not even try to be mature adults about it.

~Stephanie

Teen Fantasy Ten Things

Ten Things We Learn from Teen Fantasy Media

1. A good enough one-liner gives any teen the right to walk away from his or her parents.

2. Villains you have killed are more dangerous than live ones. Why? Because they're never ACTUALLY dead, so believing they are just makes you vulnerable to surprise attacks.

3. If any two characters share a smile and a look that lasts longer than three seconds, they will have sex together at some point.

4. No one ever actually hates/ stays mad at someone forever.

5. No one is ever actually an orphan. It's just a loophole so that a long-lost parent can show up later.

6. It is totally possible to fall in love with someone knowing nothing more than their species (human/vampire/werewolf/witch/alien/etc.) and how many visible ab muscles they have.

7. If you open a closet or refrigerator door, there will be someone standing behind it when you close it. (You are also obligated to gasp daintily, briefly shut your eyes, and murmur,  "You scared me.")

8. Sex never complicates anything. It will never be distracting or dramatic, and actually fosters intellectual development as a couple.

9. There will always be a love triangle. If there isn't one now, then brace yourself, because it's coming.

10. All girls go to bed wearing full makeup and bras.

But ultimately, everything will totes okay, as long as you and your significant other make each other's love the most important thing in the world.

~Stephanie

P.S. This is also the 600th post! Noice. Thanks for sticking it out with me :)

Fragments X

~ If you eat Red Hots like three at a time for about fifteen minute straight, your tongue hurts and your nose starts to run. Or so I hear. {Also, your cheeks turn pink.}

~ I'm kind of excited about all these "Bible" movies coming out. "Noah," "Exodus," and "Son of God"... It's interesting. Whether or not you're religious, Bible stories make epic movies.

~ But let's actually give "Exodus" its own tilde. Have you seen the cast? CHRISTIAN BALE AS MOSES AND AARON PAUL AS JOSHUA. CAN WE JUST...TAKE A MOMENT, PLEASE? OH MY GOSH. I HAVEN'T BEEN THIS EXCITED SINCE...I FOUND OUT JGL WAS GONNA BE IN "THE DARK KNIGHT RISES." AND I WAS PRETTY DAMN EXCITED ABOUT THAT.

~ I've recently been convinced to watch horror movies. I never have before, because I'm a chicken and my parents always told me about how scarred they were by watching a horror movie and how they wish they could take it back. But then my friend James pointed out that I liked to be scared, I like having nightmares, and violence doesn't bother me. I have literally the ideal personality for watching horror movies. So I've started. And have yet to be scared by Saw I or II, The Ring, Sinister, or Mama. Anthony has promised The Conjuring soon.

~ Red Hots update:  It also makes your teeth feel sensitive when you breathe in through your mouth sharply.

 ~ I like scarves and earrings now. Just in case any of you plan to send me late birthday gifts. I also still like Batman, in case that was ever in question.

~ I'm afraid that I've forgotten how to have a crush. I definitely don't have one on Anthony {who is single again, and asking me out. Mur.}. I might have one on a guy who's in my phone as "UB." I don't know. It'd be easier if I knew whether or not he liked me. I know this is going to sound conceited as hell, but I've never seriously wanted someone who didn't like me first.

~ Also, Aaron Paul is in this KoRn music video. So. Yeah. That's one more point for Aaron Paul, and one more point for KoRn. I love my life right now.

~ I always feel awkward labeling one of my posts "Funny." Isn't that kind of like laughing at your own joke?

I'm in a weird mood. I think it's all the free time I have this week. I get to look out the window and eat meals and, like...not sit at my desk for 14 hours a day. Annnnyway. I'll just go now.

~ Stephanie

The Lamest Post Ever

Supposedly, if you've seen over 85 of these, you have no life.

Though I really don't need a survey to tell me that I'm lifeless.

{I bolded the movies that I recommend, in case anyone cares.}

() The Rocky Horror Picture Show
(x) Grease
() Grease 2
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
(x) Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End
() Boondock Saints
(x) Fight Club
() Starsky and Hutch
() Blazing Saddles

Total so far:5

(x) The Neverending Story
() The Neverending Story II
() The Neverending Story III
() Airplane
(x) The Princess Bride
() Willow
(x) Anchorman
(x) Napoleon Dynamite
() Labyrinth

Total so far: 9

(x) Saw
(x) Saw II
() Saw III
() Saw IV
() Saw V
() White Noise
() White Oleander
() Anger Management
() 50 First Dates

Total so far: 11

(X)The Princess Diaries
(X)The Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement
() Scream
() Scream 2
() Scream 3
() I Know What You Did Last Summer
() I Still Know What You Did Last Summer
(X) The Shining
() Candyman
() Stand By Me

Total so far: 14

(x) Scary Movie
() Scary Movie 2
() Scary Movie 3
() Scary Movie 4
() Resident Evil 1
() Resident Evil 2
() American Pie
() American Pie 2
() American Wedding
() American Pie Band Camp

Total so far: 15

(x) Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
(x) Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
(x) Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
(x) Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
(x) Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
()The Wedding Singer
() Little Black Book
()The Village
(x) Lilo & Stitch
(x) Finding Nemo

Total so far: 22

() Finding Neverland
() Signs
(x) The Grinch
() The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (original)
() Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
() White Chicks
() Butterfly Effect
(x) 13 Going on 30
(x) I, Robot
() Robots

Total so far: 25

() Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
() Universal Soldier
() Lemony Snicket: A Series Of Unfortunate Events
() Along Came Polly
() Deep Impact
() Kingpin
() Never Been Kissed
(x) Meet The Parents
() Meet the Fockers
() Eight Crazy Nights

Total so far: 26

() Joe Dirt
() King Kong (Peter Jackson's version)
(x) A Cinderella Story
(x) The Terminal
(x) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
(x) Passport to Paris
() Dumb & Dumber
() Dumber & Dumberer
() Halloween (original)
() Surviving Christmas

Total so far: 30

(x) Final Destination
() Final Destination 2
() Final Destination 3
(x)The Ring
()The Ring 2
(x) Flubber
() Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
() Practical Magic
() Chicago
() Ghost Ship

Total so far: 33

() From Hell
() Hellboy
() Secret Window
() I Am Sam
() The Whole Nine Yards
() The Whole Ten Yards
() The Day After Tomorrow
() Child's Play
() Seed of Chucky
() Bride of Chucky

Total so far: 33

(x) Ten Things I Hate About You
() Just Married
() Gothika
(x) A Nightmare on Elm Street
(x) Remember the Titans
() Coach Carter
() The Grudge
() The Grudge 2
() The Mask
() Son Of The Mask

Total so far: 36

() Bad Boys
() Bad Boys 2
() Joy Ride
(x) Lucky Number Slevin
(x) Ocean's Eleven
(x) Ocean's Twelve
(x) Ocean's Thirteen
(x) The Bourne Identity
(x) The Bourne Supremacy
(x) The Bourne Ultimatum

Total so far: 43

(x) Sixteen Candles
(x) Pretty in Pink
() Lone Star
() Bedazzled
() Predator
() Predator II
() The Fog (original)
(x) Ice Age
(x) Ice Age 2: The Meltdown
() Curious George

Total so far: 47

(x) Independence Day
() Cujo
() A Bronx Tale
() Darkness Falls
() Christine
(x) E.T.
(x) Children of the Corn
() My Boss's Daughter
() Maid in Manhattan
() War of the Worlds

Total so far: 50

() Rush Hour
() Rush Hour 2
() Rush Hour 3
() Best Bet
(x) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
() She's All That
() Calendar Girls
() Sideways
() Mars Attacks
() Event Horizon

Total so far: 51

(x) Ever After
(x) The Wizard of Oz
(x) Forrest Gump
() Big Trouble in Little China
(x) The Terminator
() Terminator 2: Judgment Day
() Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines
(x) X-Men
(x) X-2: X-Men United
(x) X-Men: The Last Stand

Total so far: 58

(x) Spider-Man
(x) Spider-Man 2
()Spider-Man 3
(x) Sky High
() Jeepers Creepers
() Jeepers Creepers 2
() Catch Me If You Can
(x) The Little Mermaid
(x) Freaky Friday
() Reign of Fire

Total so far: 63

() The Skulls
() Cruel Intentions
() Cruel Intentions 2
() The Hot Chick
(x) Shrek
(x) Shrek 2
(x) Shrek the Third
() Swimfan
(x) Miracle on 34th Street (original)
() Old School

Total so far: 67

() The Notebook
() K-Pax
() Krippendorf's Tribe
(x) A Walk to Remember
() Ice Castles
() Boogeyman
() The 40-year-old Virgin
(x) The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
(x) The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
(x) The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King

Total so far: 71

(x) Raiders of the Lost Ark
() Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
() Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
(x) Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
() Basketball
() Hostel
() Waiting for Guffman
() House of 1000 Corpses
() The Devil's Rejects
(x) Elf

Total so far: 74


() Highlander
() Mothman Prophecies
(x) American History X
() Three
() The Jacket
() Kung Fu Hustle
() Shaolin Soccer
() Night Watch
(x) Monsters Inc.
(x) Titanic

Total so far: 77

(x) Monty Python and the Holy Grail
() Shaun Of the Dead
() Willard
() HighTension
() Club Dread
(x) Hulk
() Dawn Of the Dead
() Hook
(x) Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe
(x) Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian

Total so far: 81

() 28 Days Later
() Orgazmo
() Phantasm
() Waterworld
() Kill Bill vol 1
() Kill Bill vol 2
() Mortal Kombat
() Wolf Creek
() Kingdom of Heaven
() The Hills Have Eyes (original)

Total so far: 81

() I Spit on Your Grave aka the Day of the Woman
() The Last House on the Left
(x) Star Wars Ep. I The Phantom Menace
(x) Star Wars Ep. II Attack of the Clones
(x) Star Wars Ep. III Revenge of the Sith
(x) Star Wars Ep. IV A New Hope
(x) Star Wars Ep. V The Empire Strikes Back
(x) Star Wars Ep. VI Return of the Jedii
() Ewoks Caravan Of Courage
() Ewoks The Battle For Endor

Total so far: 87

() Re-Animator
() Army of Darkness
(x) The Matrix 
() The Matrix Reloaded
() The Matrix Revolutions
() Animatrix
() Evil Dead
() Evil Dead 2
() Team America: World Police
() Ghost town

Total so far: 88

() Red Dragon
() Silence of the Lambs
() Hannibal
() Wall-E
(x) Batman Begins
(x) The Dark Knight
() The Prestige
(x) Cars
(x) Gone With The Wind
(x) Top Gun

Total seen: 93

I am lifeless. Barely-ish.

Are you?

~Stephanie

About that Current Obsession...

[<----- Vote, fool. I need feedback.]

As you might have noticed, one of my {CurrentObsessions} (look to the right. That list. There. Yeah.) is "falling in love."

At first, I almost hated him. He was selfish, inarticulate, sloppy, and basically unintelligent. He also did drugs, which puts anyone at the bottom of my favorites list. He didn't appear to possess a single desirable quality. This went on for a long time.

I don't know when it started to change. I know that sounds cliche, but it honestly felt like one day, I just realized that my feelings were different--powerfully different. His eyes looked beautiful.

He made some very key lifestyle changes. They revealed a heart of audacious strength and fierce loyalty, but it wasn't like that flipped a switch in my mind. It did feel kind of sudden, but I think it was gradual.

I started to see streaks of genuine honor in him, and then those streaks turned to bold stripes, which melded together and formed a final, proud, loyal, honorable soul. Suddenly I noticed his words flowing smoother, his intentions growing truer, his priorities getting straighter.

Even in the face of horrific situations, he stood his ground. Out of honor, he protected even those who didn't even deserve his loyalty.

His whole demeanor has changed. Instead of radiating "punk," "junkie," "twerp," and "weasel," he now radiates qualities like authority, cunning, loyalty, and resourcefulness. Every action he takes, every word he speaks, I respect.

After his initial, long-lasting poor impression, I never expected to find him sexy. But I do. His eyes are fierce; his walk is confident; his voice is hot. I must confess:

I, Peripeteia readers, am hopelessly in love with Jesse Pinkman.

~Stephanie

P.S. Absolutely no potentially spoilerific comments, people. I'm only in Season 4.

Troll Face Week: Dog

~Stephanie

Voices

You can tell a lot about people from the way they talk. Do they have a southern accent? A Yankee accent? Do they use the word "like" as a substitute for breathing?

However, the WAY someone talks isn't the same thing as their voice.

As I {literally} said not to long ago, voices really are important to me. They're one of the first things I notice about someone {along with their eyes}. If you have an annoying voice, I probably won't like you much right away. {Hey, I'm just being honest.} When I marry someone, I'm going to have to love their voice.

I mean, obviously I pay attention to WHAT people say, but I've already talked about that. This post is about the way words sound coming out of your mouth.

And let's face it:  you can have the best idea in the world, but if your voice sounds like you've shoved an eraser up your nose or swallowed a load of cotton, it's not going to be as compelling.

My fascination with voices is actually a little ironic, because my audio processing is sort of terrible. For example, if you come up to me and say, "Stephanie, don't forget the P-R-E-S-E-N-T," it will take me about thirty seconds to figure out what you're spelling at me.

If my math teacher tells me to "Calculate sixteen plus twelve in your head really quick," it will take me even longer. {Of course, that's partly due to the fact that math affects my brain the way the words "incoming atomic bomb" affect most people.}

But nevertheless, I have an immense fascination with voices, and I thought I'd share some famous ones that I love.

1. Christian Bale ~ Batman
2. Audrey Hepburn ~ Roman Holiday
3. Heath Ledger ~ A Knight's Tale
4. James Stewart ~ Harvey
5. Joseph Gordon-Levitt ~ Inception
6. Orlando Bloom ~ Pirates of the Caribbean
7. Ian Somerhalder ~ Vampire Diaries
8. Briana Evigan ~ Step Up 2

~Stephanie

Wes Bentley

Cass thinks he's ugly, I think she's crazy.

Before the Hunger Games movie, I had never heard of Wes Bentley. But after seeing him as Seneca Crane, I won't be forgetting him any time soon.

I cannot be the only one who finds him tremendously attractive.

At first I thought it was the beard {which is, after all, insanely awesome}. So I decided to find some other shots of him. And guess what?

He's still hott. {Hey, Aaron. Two Ts ;P}

I don't know much about his personal life, except that he was married for eight years and has a two-year-old son. He was also a drug addict, but he's allegedly recovering.

I don't really doubt that he was, but he sure doesn't LOOK like a drug addict XD

Ohhhh yes. And, as always, you're welcome.

~Stephanie

Eat My Salt

<<<<< Hm?

I tutor a first-grader named Collin. Sometimes he likes to stall and take maybe three or four minutes to get his butt to the kitchen table.

I don't really care. I usually just end a text conversations or look through pictures on my phone or read whatever junk is on the table until he comes down.

Yesterday, though, he took a lot longer. I waited.

His house is big. It's expensive. It's that kind of semi-awkward quiet where you're not sure if people are REALLY in other parts of the house, or if they're just lurking around.

I started thinking about The Sound of Music.

Have you ever seen The Sound of Music? There's a part where Maria comes to the Von Trapp family's house for the first time. Their house is big and expensive and awkward-quiet. The housekeeper tells Maria "Wait here, please" and goes to get Captain Von Trapp.

Of course, no one in movies ever "waits there," and Maria ends up in the ballroom, dancing around, only to get discovered by a none-to-happy Captain Von Trapp.

Then there's the part in Princess Diaries when Mia is waiting for the Queen to come downstairs, and she lifts the lid off a random glass container. Of course it makes a loud clatter when she puts the lid back.

Those movie scenes flitted briefly through my head without any real processing. People are stupid, I thought. You know how that is. You think about it, but you don't really THINK about it.

So I kept killing time. I checked my phone, I looked over Collin's spelling test, I centered the centerpiece, I looked at the salt and pepper shakers. They were sort of people-shaped. Maybe. Hm. What were they?

I turned one of the shakers around, expecting to see a face or something decorative, but there was nothing to see. What a boring salt shaker. Or maybe it was a pepper shaker.

Which was it?

Sense of judgement = blank.

*tips shaker over*

*ten thousand tiny white grains spill everywhere*

"Oh, sh't." It was a salt-shaker apparently. With especially large holes.

*hears footsteps coming*

O_O

Here I'd been, judging Maria for wandering into another room, and Mia Thermopolis for peeking into a dish, and what do I do?

I dump salt everywhere.

I'm not proud to say that I just brushed the crap onto the floor and hoped it would disperse enough that it wouldn't be noticed. I'm pretty sure it worked.

*sigh* Moral of the story: Don't judge characters so harshly. Chances are you're every bit as dumb.

~Stephanie

P.S. The next day, they had moved the salt and pepper shakers from the table :3 They probably thought one of their kids did it. Little do they know that on occasion, and eighteen-year-old can be just as childish as a first-grader XD

Why Batman?

Some of you may know that I like Batman.

Most of you know that ^that^ was the understatement of the century.

I like Batman so much that I'm tempted to say I actually love him. The sad thing is, if he were real, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't like me that much. Aaron says it isn't personal; Batman doesn't like anyone. I guess that's true, but he loves Alfred and Robin, right? {And then there's Catwoman, but UGHDON'TGETMESTARTED.}

Batman and Superman are without a doubt my favorite heroes, and as I said last week, if you prefer Superman, that's fine with me. However personally, I decided that the Dark Knight was my hero of choice about two years ago and uphold that choice to this day. Why? For six very good reasons.

1. He has a passion for justice.

All my life, injustice has outraged me. You believe he's guilty just because that kid says so? You're letting her off the hook just because she's bawling? You think it's okay to steal just because it's for a good cause? No, no, NO!

As I've matured, I've realized how much broader the scope of injustice is. I'm a passionate patriot and I think allowing injustice to stand in America is a CRIME. It is a crime to murder, steal and cheat, but it's also a crime not to confront those offenses. It's the duty of Americans to uphold her values with our own lives.

Batman embodies this passion--even when it's difficult. Which brings me to point number two...

2. He doesn't let personal issues get in the way.

Before you wet yourself laughing, let me clarify. Yes, the whole reason for Bruce Wayne becoming Batman is a personal issue {his parents being killed}. However, as Batman, I think he does a great job of upholding justice and disregarding personal drama.

3. He has a past.

Superman is cool. However, he grew up on a farm with a great family, whereas Batman grew up in a gritty city as an orphan. Batman has something to remember, something use, something to fight for in his past.

4. He does not have powers.

Hopefully this thought has already occurred to you, but...Bruce Wayne is just a normal guy. He's not from Krypton; he's not an Amazon; he hasn't been hit by lightning. Most other heroes are SUPER. They've been blessed with unusual power, and therefore are more obligated to give back to society.

Bruce Wayne didn't have his destiny spelled out for him. He decided he wanted to fight crime all on his own, and he made it happen.

Which segues nicely into reason five...

5. He's extremely resourceful and intelligent.

Batman uses the resources he has to make what he needs {or at least delegates Lucius Fox to do it XD}. He realizes that the best solution to every problem is not ALWAYS "punch it in the face." He uses his brain as well as his brawn. He also makes me laugh sometimes. I like the time when Robin was trying to get him to watch "It's a Wonderful Life," and Bruce was like, "-_- *sigh* It's not relentlessly cheerful, is it?"

6. He's dark.

Let's face it: I prefer a dark, brooding vigilante to a wide-eyed, wholesome hero. I would have crushed on Batman over Superman even without all these awesome reasons. The reasons aren't why I fell in love with Batman.

They're why I'm STILL in love with him two years later.

~Stephanie

Disney Princesses

Alright, guys. Your turn ;)

A little while ago I listed the ten Disney Princes in order of hottness, and now it's time for me to judge the Disney Girls.

I analyzed them with six different categories: hair, eyes, bravery, intelligence, funniness, and kindness on a scale of 1-10, and used that rating as a ballpark. However, I tweaked it to reflect my opinion accurately. For example, Cinderella scored significantly higher than Jasmine, but I like Jasmine better. So I moved her up the list.

Belle

Without a doubt my favorite princess. She loves to read; she longs a life greater than what everyone assumes for her; she sacrifices herself for her family; she stands up to the Beast; she falls in love with a friend; she doesn't let romance stop her from saving her father; and she doesn't give her heart away until she's 100% sure. Belle is incredible. I want to be just like her.

Hair: 7
Eyes: 7
Brave: 10
Smart: 10
Funny: 8
Kind: 8
Overall: 50/60

Rapunzel

Rapunzel is adorable. She's innocent and hilarious and determined to live her dream. I think her and Flynn's love story is my favorite after Belle and the Beast's.

Hair: 10
Eyes: 7
Brave: 8
Smart: 8
Funny: 9
Kind: 7
Overall: 49/60

Jasmine

Jasmine is fun-loving and refuses not to marry someone she doesn't love. She's smart enough to see through Aladdin's attempt at lying. She has a pet tiger. She's Arabian. And I just really love Aladdin.

Hair: 6
Eyes: 7
Brave: 6
Smart: 6
Funny: 5
Kind: 5
Overall: 35/60

Mulan

Mulan stands up for her family in a very real, dangerous way. She isn't good at being a "perfect" girl, but she doesn't become hateful or emo about it. She tries her hardest to do the right thing, and ends up finding something ever righter. And gets a hott warrior guy along the way.

Hair: 5
Eyes: 5
Brave: 9
Smart: 9
Funny: 7
Kind: 7
Overall: 42/60

Cinderella

I think Cinderella is gorgeous. I always loved her hair when I was little, and she has the most stunning, sparkling blue eyes. Granted, she's a bit of a spaghetti spine, but hey, at least she stands up to the cat.

Hair: 8
Eyes: 10
Brave: 6
Smart: 6
Funny: 6
Kind: 10
Overall: 46/60

Aurora {Sleeping Beauty}

She's very beautiful, has a great voice, and a cute imagination. She's also not terrified of her prince, even when he sneaks up on her in the woods. However, I've never admired the way she just went and cried when the fairies told her she couldn't see Philip again. Like, really? Sneak out the window. It's not that hard.

Hair: 9
Eyes: 5
Brave: 5
Smart: 5
Funny: 4
Kind: 6
Overall: 34/60

Tiana

She's exceptionally hard-working, and struggles with finding a balance of work and fun. I can relate to that. She has pretty eyes, but terrible hair.

Hair: 3
Eyes: 5
Brave: 6
Smart: 7
Funny: 6
Kind: 7
Overall: 34/60

Pocahontas

She's pretty cool. Definitely pretty, and she has some good ideas about...saving...animals...

Hair: 7
Eyes: 7
Brave: 8
Smart: 7
Funny: 5
Kind: 7
Overall: 41/60

Ariel

*wince* Sorry. I happen to know this is a couple of peoples' favorite princess. But no. She's flat-out freaking GORGEOUS in pictures, but in the actual movie, she is not even that pretty. For real. She also forsakes her whole family for a guy she met once. Back-stabbing little rebel.

Hair: 9
Eyes: 8
Brave: 6
Smart: 1
Funny: 4
Kind: 3
Overall: 31/60

Snow White

Um...does ANYONE like her? Her voice sounds like she's singing under water; she's terrified of everything; all she does it cook and clean; she somehow misses all the warning signs when an evil-looking old hag offers her an apple after she has strict orders not to talk to anyone... Really, what is there to like?

Hair: 2
Eyes: 5
Brave: 2
Smart: 1
Funny: 1
Kind: 10
Overall: 21/60

There you have it, folks.

~Stephanie

Eighteen

<<<<<<<<< **AH-CHOO!**

Wow! Thanks for joining us, Nicole, Kelly and Karleigh! {I love alternate spellings. I have a friend that spells this name "Karlye."} Hope you guys like it here :)

I was going to post something elegant and philosophical for my birthday, but I couldn't think of anything so here's a picture of a sheep instead.

:3

Today I'm going to...

~ Eat lunch at Panera Bread.

~ Open presents, some of which hopefully have something to do with Batman.

~ Watch my mom make a chocolate pound cake for me

~ Have dinner with Cassidy {of course}, Kirsten {:D}, Jesse {she gets me}, David {he will never get me}, Daniel {yup}, Sam {maybe} and Brianna {alright}.

~ Watch "Tangled" with the aforementioned people.

Eighteen is going to be a hugely transitional year for me. I'm leaving home, going to college, losing some friends, gaining some new ones, and basically embarking on the rest of my life.

But tonight, it's just me and my friends watching a Disney movie about a girl who turns eighteen, achieves her dream, and falls in love.

It's sort of perfect, isn't it? Or maybe just ironic.

...perfectly ironic? Ironically perfect? Hm O.o

Either way, I'm pretty sure that's the story of my life XD

~Stephanie

Mainstream

"Mainstream."

A lot of Christian girl bloggers use the word like it means "the desire to be a prostitute."

I understand not wanting to be obsessed with "the things of this world," but just because something is "mainstream" does not automatically make it shallow, sexual and sinful. A lot of mainstream things are, but a lot of unpopular things are too--you just don't hear about them as much.

Then, of course, there's the eye-roll moment when the girl actually READS the books or WATCHES the movie or LISTENS to the music and suddenly--OMG IT IS THE BEST THING EVER.

{It was especially awkward when I read the Harry Potter books after years of swearing they were Satan's handiwork. Ohhh yeah. That was uncomfortable.}

I do a lot of judgmental, irrational things. However, I'm glad to say that shunning mainstream stuff on principle is no longer one of them. Frankly, I could not care less whether something is popular or not. What matters to me is not what everyone says, but what I personally think.

Pointy-toed shoes are ugly.

Hollister is overrated.

The Twilight books aren't that bad.

The Hunger Games books are really pretty good.

In my opinion, people should spend a lot less time condemning or affirming things on the basis of what the world says. I mean, I think the real point of "in-the-world-but-not-of-it" might be to form your own ideas based on personal preference and prayer. Your pastor's word is not God's, and the girl with the Abercrombie jeans is not Satan.

Everyone Loves Glee =/= Glee sucks.

Glee sucking is what makes Glee suck XD Ahahaha. Lawl.

*ahem* Sorry.

People need to stop judging and start experiencing. God doesn't want us to shun the world, and he doesn't want us to be sheltered, shell-shocked sissies.

Just something that's been on my mind.

~Stephanie

Sleeping Beauty Questions

My friends and I recently sat down and watched "Sleeping Beauty." I fully expected it to be boring, predictable, cheesy, and stupid.

It was not.

I seriously enjoyed the movie. I don't know why I was so convinced it would suck. Even Princess Aurora wasn't as bad as I'd anticipated.

However, being the people we are, my friends and I couldn't help but make a few slightly sarcastic observances.

- It's heinously unfair for the king to command EVERYONE to burn their spinning wheels just to keep one girl safe.

- How could Aurora dream about the prince if she'd probably never seen a man before? She'd lived in the woodcutter's cottage alone with the three good fairies her entire life. How could she know what a man looked like? And how would you explain that, anyway? "They're like us girls, but with deeper voices and...different..."

- Don't the fairies realize that by putting the entire kingdom to sleep, they're wiping out a good percentage of the guys who might be able to kiss Sleeping Beauty awake? I mean, good thing Prince Philip wasn't in the kingdom at the time.

- Prince Philip loses his Shield of Virtue and his Sword of Truth while fighting Maleficent. Is that to say that you lose your virtue and honesty in your quest for love? Or that once you've found it, you don't need those things anymore?

Aaand that's what happens when four highly analytical seventeen-year-olds get together to watch an old Disney classic.

~Stephanie

Disney Princes Go PG-13

Sorry Jay, Sam, and Aaron. It's another exclusively girl post.

While getting pictures for the Disney Princes list, I came across a fascinating page.

Fairytales Gone Sexy.

Someone has taken the Disney Princes and redrawn them in a slightly sexier light. Let's face it, girls: our taste has matured a bit since we were five.

Of course, not all the redraws work in my opinion. Some of them weren't especially attractive {Aladdin}, some of them were downright ugly {Tarzan and Shang}, some of them were better in cartoon {Prince Philip}, and some of them were unnecessary. {Like Will Turner NEEDED a redraw.}

But they all made me smile, and a couple of them were quite jaw-droppingly hott. I thought I'd share some of my favorites.

John Smith from Pocahontas

Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid

Peter Pan

Ahaha. You're welcome. Hopefully this didn't feel like having your childhood innocence brutally slaughtered in front of your eyes.

~Stephanie

Being Belle

As you probably know, "Beauty and the Beast," the greatest animated Disney movie of all time, is back in theaters for its 3D version! Aside from the Lion King's 3D phase, I hadn't ever seen a classic Disney film in theaters. I was like 1 or 2 or -3 when they all came out.

So some of my friends and I went to see "Beauty and the Beast" last week :D It's amazing how much detail you notice on the big screen. I loved it even more than usual.

But of course, being me and my friends, we couldn't just go see a movie like this. Not just plain "go see it." Being me and my friends, we had do something unusual and awesome about it.

So we dressed up.

Me as Belle, Kirsten as Gaston

Now, I knew I would look odd. I knew people would give me weird looks. I knew I'd probably get stared at. But I admit:

Being legitimately mistaken for Belle by small children never occurred to me.

The first time it happened was in the bathroom. It was before the movie started, and already I've forgotten that I was wearing a costume. Kirsten and I really had to pee, so we raced into the bathroom and I slammed the door of my stall. Then I heard a little voice go,

" *gasp* Mom! Mom, I just saw Belle!"

I heard the mom gently acknowledge her daughter, but she was apparently talking to another grown-up. Then I heard little tapping footsteps and the mother say,

"Emmy! You can't look under the stall doors! People might be in there!"

O_O Oh my. She was COMING FOR ME.

The girl quit, but I waited for a bit in the stall anyway, sort of hoping she and her mom would leave. They didn't right away, and I didn't want to miss any of the previews, so I had to come out.

I cautiously opened the door and went to the sink. The little girl's mouth opened slightly.

"Mom. Behind you," she whispered.

I smiled and waved as the mother turned. Her eyes lit up in recognition.

"Oh, is that Belle?" she said, stroking the girl's light brown ringlets. "Say hi."

The little girl stared with huge, awestruck blue eyes.

I waved again and said, "Bonjour."

Then Kirsten and I had to get back to the theater. But that little girl in the bathroom pretty much made my life.

I got stopped three times on the way out after the movie by parents and their kids who wanted to say hi to Belle. I loved it. I've always wanted to be Belle at Disney, so it was kind of a dream-come-true experience.

At Panera Bread later that night the cashier lady asked if she could put my name in the system as "Belle." When I told her sure, she said, "This just made my day!" So when my sandwich was ready, the whole restaurant turned to watch "Belle" go and retrieve her order.

*dramatic, dreamy sigh* Day in the life, I suppose. Never a dull moment.

No really. Never XD

~Stephanie

Disney Princes

I've done a lot of hott guy posts in my time {just check the sidebar on the right}, and even a hott actress one.

But it never occurred to me to look at the cartoons until today.

At church {I know, so sacrilegious of us}, my friends Cassidy and Jesse {who is a girl, and no, I didn't misspell her name} and I were talking about Disney movies. Before long, we were contemplating the attractiveness of the princesses, and then inevitably, the princes.

There are ten "official" Disney princesses, and they each have a "prince," even though some of them aren't technically royal.

I guess when you find the right guy, he's your own personal prince. Or something.

The point is, I've put the ten Disney princes into order of overall hottness, taking into account their personalities as well as physical aesthetics. And heeeeeeeeeeere they are.

Flynn Rider {Tangled}

Flynn is the hottest prince in my opinion, hands down. You guys know I have a weakness for expressive eyebrows, and he has that covered nicely. I also dig the goatee. As a general rule, I dislike facial hair. However on the off chance that a guy CAN pull if off, I find it extremely attractive.

Flynn's personality is actually what put him over the top by a lot. He's funny, witty, sarcastic, quick-thinking, and daring. He protects Rapunzel and falls selflessly in love with her, BUT. He still maintains his personality. I hate, hate, hate, hate, HAAAAAAATE it when a guy falls in love and suddenly he's all weepy and sunshine and butterflies. Why do you think the girl fell for you in the first place? DON'T LOSE THAT.

*ahem*

So yeah. Flynn is the hottest.

Prince Philip {Sleeping Beauty}

Did you realize Prince Philip was this attractive? I didn't even remember what he looked like until Cassidy insisted that he was hott. So we looked him up. She was right. Sharp jaw, mischievous eyes, not disgusting eyebrows. All good. So I watched some clips on Youtube, and was further encouraged.

"No. Carrots." He looks hott when he says that to his horse, who dumps him in a lake XD

He's also witty, sarcastic and smart. He definitely has more personality than Sleeping Beauty, who is not even known by her given name and says about twenty words {not set to music} the entire movie.

Aladdin

Physically, I don't find Aladdin suuuper attractive. However, he's the only prince who's chest/abs you actually get to see {besides Shang}, so he doesn't have a lot of competition there. He's also tan, which I love.

Personality-wise, I love Aladdin. He's adventurous and brave. He's carefree, but clever enough not to get caught. And in the end, he sets the genie free. How nice.

Prince Adam {The Beast}

The Beast in human form, Adam, is hideous. His nose is awkward and pointy and his lips are gross and his Adam's apple is so big it looks like he swallowed a golfball.

However. If we were going on personality alone, the Beast, AKA Prince Adam, would tie with Flynn Rider. Adam is the most real prince of them all. He has flaws. The other princes are "perfect." Adam was a selfish, angry jerk in the beginning, and had to learn how to love--and he did. He became kind, but knew how to have fun. He gives Belle a library, the most amazing gift in the world.

Their love story is legit. They don't like each other, then they look deeper, then they understand each other, then they make sacrifices, then they realize they've fallen in love. It's not just "OH YOU'RE HAWT LET'S MARRY" or "DAANG YOU HAZ A PRETTY VOICE I LUV YOU" or "I'M BORED LET'S FALL IN LOVE." Belle and Prince Adam are real people and they fall in love in a real and meaningful way. That's beautiful.

Prince Charming {Cinderella}

He's actually a little girly-looking now that I pay close attention. But, his features have a neat, precise quality that I like, and I love dark hair. So there you go.

Prince Charming admittedly has the personality of a cabbage, but he does do two things right. First, he asks Cinderella to dance. Then he goes to great lengths to find her again. Good job. You get some points, bro.

Captain John Smith {Pocahontas}

John Smith has a strong jaw, BRIGHT blue eyes and a pioneer-strong body. He's extremely attractive physically. I'm not super familiar with the Pocahontas movies though, so I can't say if his personality is significantly greater than the other princes'. I do remember him not being a pushover though, which is good.

But I really remember nothing from the movie, so even THAT might be misguided.

Shang {Mulan}

I'm probably going to get cyber-yelled at for putting him this far down the list. I know, he has a great body. A really great body. But his FACE. Not a fan. And I don't really do bulk. I mean, I like a ripped guy as much as the next girl, but he's just sort of huge. I dunno.

I do like his personality though. It's hott. Tough, determined, good fighter, strong sense of justice, good relationship with his father...

Well damn. Maybe I should have put him higher up the list.

Prince Eric {The Little Mermaid}

Dark hair, bright eyes, not-too-bulky body. Nice, nice, nice. I like him.

He's this far down the list because I haven't seen the movie since I was like seven and I really don't remember him much. He did not, at least, fall in love with only a voice or only a face, thank God. Originally it was Ariel's voice that got his attention, yes. But he continued to love her personality even after her voice was taken. So there. He has some depth.

Prince Naveen {Princess and the Frog}

Oh shut up. I am not racist.

Naveen just doesn't make an impression on me. I wish I could remember enough about him to move him definitively up or down the list, but I just can't recall much of his personality. He stops being a self-absorbed 'tard, which is good, and his features are smooth, which is fine. But as an overall package...doesn't do a lot for me.

The Prince {Snow White's prince}

Ew. Ugly face, no personality whatsoever. He appears twice. One to stalk Snow White, which is creepy, and once to kiss her when he thinks she's dead. Also creepy. He's not even around when she eats the stupid poisoned apple. If you could find her to kiss her, you could find her to save her. Just saying.

~Stephanie