Apology

In March, I did a post on the Five Love Languages {Quality Time, Physical Touch, Acts of Service, Gifts, Words of Affirmation}. Theoretically, every person has a way that they interpret and feel love the most.

A little while ago, I learned that there are also Five Apology Languages. That sounded interesting; I had never consciously thought about people preferring different types of apologies, although I immediately realized that it's true.

When I saw there was a quiz attached to the page, my interest turned to total fascination and I took the quiz XD I had no idea what result I was going to get, because I didn't actually know what the five languages were.

Turns out, the Five Apology Languages are Expressing Regret, Accepting Responsibility, Making Restitution, Genuinely Repenting, and Requesting Forgiveness.

The highest possible score in each language is 20, but my highest number was a 6. I guess I pretty evenly value all forms of apologizing XD But here were my results:

Making Restitution: 6

Genuinely Repenting: 6

Accepting Responsibility: 5

Expressing Regret: 2

Requesting Forgiveness: 1

You have chosen Making Restitution as your primary Apology Language. You find it easiest to forgive when action is taken to compensate for the wrong done to you. You listen not only to admission of fault, but also for the question, What can I do to make it better?

Quite accurate, actually.

It annoys me when people apologize with just words and then continue as if nothing happened. If you're really sorry, do something about it. Make a change. Make it up to me. Don't be thirty minutes late, brush it off with an, "Oh, sorry," and then do it again the next day. Bullcrap.

It's also really important to me that people mean it when they apologize. I can't decide if I'd rather have a fake apology or none at all. My gut reaction is that if you're not sorry, shut up and don't say you are. However, if someone at least pretends to be sorry, at least they realize it's a big enough deal that they should apologize. So I'm torn on that. Either way, genuinely wanting to act differently in the future is a huge deal, so it rightfully ties for first place.

Accepting responsibility is a very close second. Reasons are fine, excuses are not. And especially don't blame ME if it's not my fault. I actually don't believe I have a problem with accepting responsibility that is mine, and it's a HUGE pet peeve of mine when people do.

To me, Expressing Regret is kind of a wimpy, half-assed combination of Making Restitution and Genuinely Repenting. I'm glad you feel bad about what you did, but don't just say that. Mean it and do something about it.

Requesting Forgiveness is not even something I look for. If I'm going to forgive you, I will. Conduct yourself differently in the future, win back my trust, make a change. Don't ask me for forgiveness. It almost seems overly submissive to me, which is something I hate in people.

This stuff fascinates me. Maybe I should just forget political science and go into psychology.

I'm really interested in what your Apologies Languages might be. If you want to, take the quiz HERE and let me know what you get.

~Stephanie

P.S. I also took the Love Language quiz again, 'cause it was there and I was bored. My results are exactly the same, except that Gifts went down one point and Physical Touch went up one. Cool.

For the Record

I have a lot of problems. But I think we all know that one of them is the fact that I tend to stifle my thoughts and feelings when I don't know how to deal with them.

However, unfortunately the problem doesn't stop there. I have a naturally big mouth when it comes to my personal problems, and my obvious inability to shut the hell up leads to me vomit things onto Pandora instead of A) facing them myself or B) discussing them with the appropriate people. It's weak, it's immature, it's unfair, and it's something I've grown increasingly frustrated with over the past few weeks.

Last night, I posted some freewriting. It was a lot less profane than the first one, but, in my mind, a lot more inappropriate and hurtful and it kept me from sleeping well.

I don't understand myself. I don't understand what I'm thinking when I write things. I don't understand why I think it's a good idea to post things. I don't understand, and until I do, I really don't know that I can keep blogging, at least not about anything personal.

This is not a call for people to tell me that I need a place to open up, or that they enjoy reading about my personal life, or any number of the encouraging things that part of me would like to hear. Please don't say them. Blogging like that doesn't help me. It hurts me a lot, and if I keep it up, I'm positive that it will hurt other people too {if it hasn't already}.

It's BEYOND time for me to grow up enough that I can A) deal with my problems in an appropriate manner, and B) deal with my problems in an appropriate manner.

So yeah, that's pretty much what needs to happen.

But before I end this post, I want to set something straight. I'm about to be really honest, and it's going to be monumentally hard, but I actually believe it's a good idea.

I rambled before about not being able to trust Sam. And I cannot believe I said that.

Not only was it wrong to blog about that when I don't even mention it to actual people, but it's really unfair of me to feel that way in the first place.

Guys, Sam is great. He's a great person, but he's an incredible friend and boyfriend also.

On Pandora, you only see a teeny, tiny, inconsequential sliver of how crazy, emotional, ridiculous and confusing I am. I get emotional, and I don't want to talk about it; I get all weird and I read my old journals, and that's always a terrible idea; I get really, really into things like Batman and debate; people often mistake me for angry when I'm actually just passionate about whatever it is we're discussing.

You see some of that on Pandora. But imagine being around that in real life. In person. All the time. And being expected to cope with it.

Over the years, I've had five intensely close friends with whom I have shared my insanity. They're people that I share my writing with, spill my problems to, ask opinions of, and look to for help.

There's a pattern with these friendships. Once I open up to the person, the friendship lasts about a year or two, and then the person moves on and we aren't close anymore.

Do I blame these people? I could be fooling myself, but I don't think I do. Am I sad? Well, yeah. But I understand. *I* wouldn't want to deal with me. I cannot conceive of anyone ELSE wanting to deal with me. It's such a job; I'm such a piece of work.

But there's one exception to this law of lost friendships. And that's Sam.

Out of the five closest friends, Sam has known the most and been the closest for the longest. Yeah, he did some things that he's not proud of, and I wasn't thrilled about them either, but he's here now. He's still around. He still listens to me. He still talks to me. He still helps me. He still makes me laugh when I honestly don't think I can.

And as far as I can tell, no matter how difficult I am, no matter how emotional I get, no matter how hard I try not to let this go so deep...he's gonna stick around.

He knows the terrible things I think. He knows how I struggled with my mom. He knows about the masochism issues. He knows the doubts I have about God. He knows all my secrets. He has for a while. There aren't things that I can't tell him.

Except for when it comes to how much he means to me. I don't say that. I don't like to talk about attachment or trust or really deep, scary love. I'm almost positive that he knows anyway, but it's like if I say so myself...I dunno, it's almost like losing a game. Or going into battle without armor. After giving my sword to the approaching army.

I don't like to be open like that, because I'm a coward.

My biggest problem with trust isn't with everyone else. It's with me. I lack the emotional courage to put it all on the line and live life RIGHT NOW. Sure, you get hurt more if you do that, but that's what life is about. Life isn't about getting by without scars. It's about getting hurt and healing and learning to love life anyway.

I'm tired of trying to be tough by not trusting people. It's high time I learned that being tough IS trusting people. And my not trusting people, my not trusting Sam, is a reflection of who *I* am and the condition of MY heart, not a reflection of their, of his, character.

Sam, you're doing everything right. I love you and I'm sorry for being ridiculous and unfair. I'm working on it.

{I also think the whole distrust thing in the deleted post probably bothered ME a lot more than it bothered him XD But it bothered me a whole hurtful heck of a lot, so I just wanted to set it straight.}

And I might get laughed at or mocked for this, or the feelings in this post might get treated lightly. That's what I'm afraid of, it's what I'm always afraid of. And if that happens, it will hurt, but that will be okay. It's all part of the process. It's all part of letting my heart be part of the world again.

Good god, I hope I don't regret this.

~Stephanie

To What I Have Been Up

Hanging out at the pool with Sarah.

Winning medals for swimming the fastest with just my legs.

Loving Adventure Time.

And this guy.

Mostly being late.

And my usual romantic self.

Making Daniel-and-the-Lions'-Den themed cupcakes.

Preparing to be one of these.

And seeing this.

With this.

And this.

So yeah. That's my life. What's been yours?

~Stephanie

Facebook Love

We all love to gripe about the Facebook couples who post junk like, "OMG BABY LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCHHH <333" after they've been dating for two weeks.

*eyeroll* "They've been together for fourteen days; they don't love each other."

I've always sided with the crowd of sneering onlookers. Love isn't something you feel all of a sudden when you go Facebook Official. It's a feeling, yes, but it's also a choice. {However, this is not a post where I will go into the definition of love.}

But a month or so ago, I had a revelation:

If you don't ALREADY love someone--at least in some way--why are you dating them to begin with?

It isn't actually a despicable, ridiculous thing to love someone two weeks into the relationship. Some people date casually {which is fine, as long as both parties are aware of it XD}, but a lot of people these days date because they really care about someone, and want to consider a future with them.

If you view dating the second way {I do}, then I think it's "worse" NOT to love someone two weeks into the relationship.

However.

There are different types of love. I think people should love each other as deep, genuine friends before they date. But it still might be {I'll even say PROBABLY IS} inappropriate for them to declare their everlasting feelings of truelove for each other after a fortnight of commitment.

Also, I do realize that the inappropriate declaration above is typically what the obnoxious Facebook posts refer to. So that's still terrible. But it got me thinking that in at least one way, it's unfair of us to say "You've only been dating for two weeks; you can't love each other."

Of course, bear in mind that it is always, always, always, always, always, always, always, always, always inappropriate and terrible to post gooey junk on Facebook.

Always.

So yeah. That's what I have to say about that.

~Stephanie

Rich and Miserable

As I write this, I am sitting in an expensive recliner with a touch-screen computer monitor on the table to my right, and the thin, wireless keyboard in my lap.

I'm not looking at the screen; I'm staring at the flatscreen TV on the wall across from me. It's big enough for two or three people to sleep on if it were laid on the ground.

Snuggled into my right leg is a small, brown poodle.

Upstairs is a theater-sized screen hooked up to every game system ever produced, with several controllers for each, and charging stations for everything. There are also three beds from which I can take my pick tonight.

Downstairs is a pool table, a treadmill, and elliptical, and probably a good amount of alcohol.

What am I doing?

I'm house-sitting, for Collin's family. {Collin is the little first-grader I tutored this year.}

They've gone out of town on vacation to the Dominican Republic {Yeah, no big deal.}, so I get to stay here over the weekend :D Someone else is coming to house-sit for the rest of the week.

Money does not make you happy, but I'd much rather be crying and miserable in a house like this than a dirty little shack. Just saying.

The overwhelming irony is that I'm actually doing just that XD

~Stephanie

P.S. Don't worry. I'm just going through my usual FUCK EMOTIONS phase. I'll be fine soon. Go in peace.

Gray Area Part 1

When I was younger, I was a very black and white person. If something were right, everything else was WRONG and you were a barbaric fool for not recognizing it. If a guy with piercings walked past the van when I was waiting for my in the parking lot, I'd lock all the doors and duck down. If I disliked someone, I hated them with a frightening fiery passion deep within my soul.

I also didn't do gradual changes. When I decided to start exercising, I ran for an hour and did 200 crunches right away.

When we moved, I waited until the night before we left the house to pack up all of my things and immediately moved them in the next day.

When I saw a friendship that needed to stop, I severed it promptly and completely.

There was no middle ground for me. Everything was extremes, and people who thought differently were idiots to be avoided. The concept of "in between" was repulsive and morally wrong. Moderation and gray area were for the weak.

As I've matured, I've gotten LESS that way. I could tell you that I no longer judge anything about anyone and that the world is full of different and equally correct perspectives, but a) I don't lie on Pandora, and b) Cassidy and Sam would rat me out rather quickly.

In a lot of ways, I'm still the same black or white, left or right, yes or no, in or out girl I was when I was nine.

I hate being "okay" at things. I'd rather monumentally suck than be embarrassingly mediocre. {Of course, I'd rather be phenomenally great than either one of those.}

I hated the massive expanse of gray area of ALMOST dating Sam. There are probably something like ten months of gray area by the time you piece it all together. That area where we weren't official and I hadn't actually stated that I liked him that way, so I had to be rabid about labeling our hanging out as NOT DATING. There were things we couldn't say or do or think because were just friends. It was unpredictable. It was frustrating. It was maddeningly unstable.

Gray area. *shudders*

Then at college orientation last weekend I discovered another enlightening example of my hatred for gray area.

Yeah, I finally made a decision. Talk about some horrifying gray area. Not knowing where I was going to attend college was like a stomachache for six months straight. But I'm going to Campbell University with the hopes of transferring to Wake Forest for the fall of 2013 :) I think it's all going to work out.

But situations like orientation really take it out of me. I have to be animated and engaged and charismatic to an extreme level. Not only do I have to take in a brainload of information, but I also have to not get lost on campus, make powerful positive first impressions on my professors, and not get immediately written off by the other students. The first of orientation lasted fifteen hours. I was beyond exhausted by the time I finally got to collapse in bed.

I also don't approve of the gradual transition to college, at least for me personally. That's one thing about me that has not changed. I hate phasing into or out of things. None of this "Let's spend time on campus ahead of time," or "It'll be easier if you already have friends at Campbell," or "Why don't you start thinking about dorm decorations now?"

I want to live 100% at home until the day I move in.

I want to hang out exclusively with my hometown friends until I actually attend Campbell.

I want to wait and jump into dorm decor in one sudden plunge two days before I move in.

Toward the end of Orientation Day 1, I whined my mom, "I just want to go home." I could tell that made her really nervous. If I couldn't stand being away from home for two days, how was this going to work? I thought about it for a minute.

"I'll be fine once I move in here," I amended honestly. "Once I have all my stuff and am settled, THIS will be home."

And that's pretty much true. I know I'll be homesick. I know there will be times when I'll hate it. But my method of operation is to detach myself from the coming change until it's absolutely upon me, then plunge in and deal with it because I must. To jump straight from black to white, left to right, out to in.

Bypass the gray area.

I don't know that this is the best way to be. In some ways, I still firmly believe that gray area is WRONG. But I think there's also a lot of value in learning to take things at a responsible pace and not be so inflexible. I also think I might have a double standard about gray area, but that's a discussion for another time.

How do you feel about the in between?

~Stephanie

The F Word

freewriting. for thirty minutes, i do nothing but write down every conscious thought that runs through my mind. while petting my dog, Licorice. outside in the dusk as a storm brewed.

Now my hand smells like dog. It didn't for a while. Weird.

I should repaint my toenails.

I wonder why my stomach is so loud.

Is that cloud or sky?

People tell me I'm pretty a lot. I hope it doesn't get to me.

That sounds like a cartoon rocket--no, meteor--about to strike.

The street lamp turned on. Narnia.

My phone vibrating on concrete sounds terrible.

My hair looks really good.

Lightning.

Licorice just walked away while I was still petting her. That's literally never happened before.

I should write that script.

American flag.

I never blogged about Independence Day. I should've. Wish I had.

Remember when Taylor and I both thought it was "independAnce?"

I miss dance. I miss Mrs. Lauren.

Good lord. Gotta send her her present.

Ellie's wedding present.

Remember when we found Narnia?

Tree frogs.

Remember when the trees talked and we heard Susan's horn and saw a wolf?

Remember when you thought you controlled the wind?

It's really pleasant out here.

Dog.

I have to work tomorrow.

Tomorrow is me and Sam's three-monthiversary. Hm.

Lightning bug.

The trees look so dark.

Remember--lightning--when you used to talk stories? Why don't you anymore? Not everything has to mean something, get finished. It's for fun. Just 'cuz.

Chill bumps.

"A lacy flood of goosebumps." I like that.

He does not give me goosebumps. Shit.

Why lie?

How come--come XD--you get to lie and no one else does? Because I can already trust myself.

Your mouth gets all tense when you write. It's 'cuz I can't get my hand to move fast enough--innuendo--and it's borderline stressful.

I could walk to Greensboro. What if I did? It's totally possible. I could stab threatening people with my hair clip.

I know how to rip someone's ear off.

Theoretically.

Wardrobe.

My nails are bad.

My shoulder hurts. It's tense.

He rubs my shoulders. Why is he so nice to me? I'm not nearly as nice to him.

I should be.

Gah, how? I don't even...*sigh*

Lightning. Me gusta.

I wanna live outside.

Ew, sit up. This isn't your shirt. The concrete will pick it.

Sarah said "shit" the other day. It's all my fault.

These shorts are probably too short. How come Mom and Daddy let me wear them? That's so weird.

I wonder how strict I'll be. PC thinks he'll be really strict about clothing. That's hot interesting.

He--hm, let's not go there. Go away.

Lightning. Blue.

I wanna go to Campbell right now. New place. Work for my brain.

Friggin' Ryan. Good god, how--he could write a book called How Not to Get Stephanie to Like You. Ignore my relationship status; ask me my bra size, how far I've gone, what I wear to bed, if my boyfriend and I behave; tell me I'm pretty six million times. GOOD GOD. I hate him sort of. Not yet. But ugh. F--screw off, Ryan.

It's dark.

Lightning bug.

I gotta get Licky out of the garage.

I have double standards.

That was such a weird sound o_o

I've gained weight. I think.

What if I lived on an island?

Remember that story about kids on an island? That's actually really good.

Aw damn. Neighbors.

I cussed in the pool parking lot. This has to stop. What if someone had heard me?

Is this freewriting?

I should journal.

Or script.

Ughhhhhh.

I think no one should ever see this.

Whaat? It hasn't even gotten dirty.

Good lord, do NOT even think anything--stop it.

I've been clean for 18 months.

It was--it has been--difficult. Is.

Yeah.

I wonder what would happen if I married him?

What do you mean "happen?"

Just...hang on. Lightning.

Dammit, I keep missing the good lightning.

Is that the only swear word you use?

Shut up.

You should talk more. Don't lose the intellectual aspects.

Spider. Ew, what if it crawls in your shorts again?

You should go inside. You can hardly see this paper.

Yeah.

No.

Sigh.

~Stephanie

Unavoidably Loved

You are unavoidably loved.

Check out the post I wrote for Miss Unlimited HERE :)

~Stephanie

Sam Questions

You know that I have a boyfriend. His name is Sam. And I get asked a lot of questions about him. You may also know that while I really like answering questions, I'm bad at emotions. That's why it's taken a written survey of questions to coax me out of my sentimental snail shell and get me to talk about Sam. But I'm apparently going to.

It's late. It's really late. And I know I've been absent for SO LONG. And this is sort of a strange way to start blogging again. You might not be able to respect this. That's fine. Read the blog description.

I never promised you anything but the hope of me becoming better XD There's always room for improvement.

Without further ado, I give you a bunch of questions about my relationship with Sam.

What’s his name? Sam

How old is he? 17

When did you meet? February 2009

Where did you meet? Driver’s ed XD We were romantic from the start.

Was it love at first sight? Nope. The first time we talked I was chilling beside a baseball field waiting for my ride to get there. He was literally chasing after another girl XD I said “Hey” in an effort to be normal and not the weird nerd girl, and he spoke back. The conversation lasted about thirty-five seconds.

When was it 'official'? April 10th. Of this year.

How'd you start dating? I mean, we were like best friends, and he'd like me this way for a really long time. Eventually I let myself like him back.

Is he your first boyfriend? Yes, actually.

Do you think you have a good relationship? I really do.

Where was your first date? I don’t know what you’d call our “first date.” The first time we went somewhere after becoming official was to see The Avengers. So probably that.

How long until you met the parents? I mean, when we met we couldn’t drive, so parents were in the picture pretty early on.

When did you have your first kiss? *chest compresses* June…29th. But neither of us could remember it for sure, so also July 2nd XD

Where was it? Both on my couches, but different couches.

What did you first slow dance to? Some horrible Taylor Swift song at sophomore prom XD

Is there anything he has done for you that he wouldn’t do for another person? I mean, probably.

Has he ever written anything for you? I hear he’s writing me a letter. But that remains to be seen ;P

What’s your happiest memory of him? I was pretty excited when he asked my dad’s permission to date me. But that’s more “excited,” not just “happy.” So…I don’t know XD We’re happy a lot. We went on a picnic on June 10th (thanks, Sarah!), and that whole thing was really fun. And last Saturday I was in a terrible mood and he cheered me up completely XD I just like doing normal things with him. Going to Dollar General. Being bored at my house. Making Ramen.

What’s the sweetest thing he has ever done for you? He does lots of nice things. More than I do. I’m terrible at sweet things. My chest spazzes out and I get all self-conscious and end up being sarcastic or just quiet. But ANYWAY. I had on heels once as we were walking down a LONG gravel driveway. He let me wear his flip-flops and walked barefoot instead.

Does he buy you lots of gifts? I’m not really a gifts kind of person.

Does he know your biggest secret? Yes.

What’s your favorite thing to do together? We do a lot of “nothing.” Which entails playing Barrel of Monkeys and halfway watching movies.

When did you know you were falling in love? I don’t know. I’ve loved him for a lot longer than I’ve been IN love with him. I don’t know when it evolved.

Who said 'I love you' first? He did.

Is it true love? Yeah.

How do you know this? It’s constant. It’s different.

What’s his worst habit? Saying “Word?” XD

What annoys you about him? He doesn’t always take me seriously. But honestly, that’s probably for the best XD

What is your favorite part of his personality? His audacious sense of irony.

Is there something he does that you don’t approve of? Not as much anymore, I don’t think. Actually no, I disapprove of him flipping me backwards underwater in the pool.

Is there something you do that he doesn’t approve of? Watch trashy reality TV, drive 94 down country roads, love Shinedown…XD

Has he ever hurt you badly? Definitely not physically.

Would he ever cheat? I don’t think so.

Has he to your knowledge ever cheated? Not this time around XD

Do you trust him? The only possible problem is when he lies to himself.

Have you ever cried over him? *sigh* Fine. Yes.

Is he there when you need him the most? Yes.

Hair color? Red.

Eye color? I say they're teal.

What is your favorite part of his appearance? I like the expressions in his eyes. And his smile.

What does he smell of? I don’t remember the name of his body wash XD Something with “arctic” in it. But he always smells the same and I love it.

Whats he wearing when you picture him in your head? A green T-shirt and khaki cargo shorts. {Wow, that was weird.}

How do you feel when he holds you? {Good god. This whole section is one big chest-contracting moment of gasp-age. Good. Lord. Almighty. *continues*} Like…intensely happy? And calm.

How do you feel when you fall asleep and wake up in his arms? Usually I spazz out inside, but that’s just because I feel like I’ve been rude by falling asleep. Other than that, I feel the above.

How does it feel when he touches you? Like a tiny fist of adrenaline sitting in the pit of my stomach.

Does his touch give you goose bumps? Yeah.

Does he kiss your neck? Yeah.

Your tummy? No.

Your forehead? I think. Probably.

Could you be without him? Yeah. I’d rather not though.

Is the relationship getting serious? We wouldn’t be dating if we didn’t seriously like each other.

Do you think about him constantly when your apart? First of all, it’s “you’re.” Second of all, I do think about him a good bit.

How long have you been together? Like two and a half months officially.

Can you see a future together? Yes, but I also realize that we have a lot of experience to go before we’re fully matured. So anything can happen.

Would you like to get married? If it still seems like a good idea when it’s the right time.

Have children? Of course.

Where can you see your relationship in 5 years time? I know we’ll still love each other, in some way.

Do you know there is definitely no-one better out there for you? I don’t know that yet, and he can’t know that I’m the best for him. But that doesn’t mean we aren’t the best for each other right now.

How do you know this? I didn’t answer a black-and-white yes, you automated survey question.

Are you scared he might find someone better? If he does, I’ll be happy for him. And I genuinely mean that.

Is he your best friend as well as your lover? Aside from Cassidy, yes.

Does he come first over everyone else in your life? That’s intense. He’s way up there on the list, but, like, I have a little sister XD

Would you die for him? Yes.

Whats the funniest thing you have ever done together? Buy lots of Adventure Time apparel, maybe XD

Say something that only you two understand? Pick up Chet last.

Do you have nick names for each other? Not really. His “codename” was/is PC, so I’ve used that like four times.

Does he make you laugh? Is that even a question? Yes.

Do you wrestle? Kind of?

Is he ticklish? In like one tiny spot.

Are you? Not per se XD

WHAT’S HIS FAVORITE…

Food? Steak. Swedish Fish. Potatoes.

Drink? Hm, Cheerwine?

Sport? Lacrosse, I guess.

Movie? I don’t actually know for sure.

TV Show? King of the Hill and Adventure Time.

Song? It changes.

Past time? Burning Sand 3? :P Music, hanging out with friends.

Thing about your personality? He likes that I’m intelligent XD

One of your features? He’s told me he likes my eyes, but I don’t actually know what his favorite is.

Animal? Penguin

Color? Red

Aftershave? I don’t know XD

Clothing style? Like…comfortable? Purple things :P

Band? It changes. But I feel like it's been at different times Dinosaur Jr., Foo Fighters, Fallout Boy…

WHAT’S YOUR…

Song? I guess it used to be “Such Great Heights,” but I don’t know that we have one this time. Do we?

DVD? Tangled? XD Adventure Time.

Place to hang out? Pretty much my house.

Meal to cook together? Ramen XD

LAST…

Time you saw him? Forty minutes ago.

Kissed him? An hour and a half ago XD

Spoke to him? Five seconds ago.

Text he sent you? “...what?” XD

Fight? We don’t really fight. We do argue, but it’s not really ever a big deal.

WHEN WILL YOU…

See him again? I don't know.

Speak to him again? In five seconds.

Tell him you love him again? I don’t know.

HAVE YOU EVER…

Spent the night together? Nope.

Been on holiday? Nope.

Met his parents? Yup.

Made him cry? Not this time, I don’t think.

Done anything spontaneous together? Probably.

Is this love? I’m pretty sure you asked that already. But yes.

Are you both happy? Yes.

~Stephanie