Thursday, February 28, 2013


Alana mentioned that she hates Ryan Gosling and Tom Cruise, and that got me thinking about the actors and actresses that I hate--and love.

I left out the obvious, shallow ones {Christian Bale, Joseph Gordon-Levitt}, even if they're legitimately good actors. These lists are more for the unexpectedly appreciated or surprisingly repulsive talent.

Actors/Actresses I Hate
1. Tom Cruise - I don't care what character he's playing, all I see is Tom Cruise. I'm pretty sure that's all he sees, too. And he's short.
2. Ryan Reynolds - Unbelievably overrated.
3. Jim Carrey - He's not an actor. He doesn't act. He contorts his nasty rubber face.
4. Will Ferrel - Mostly I just dislike the kind of humor he specializes in.
5. Billy Crystal - He just grosses me out.
6. Keira Knightly - She never completely closes her mouth. She probably thinks it's sexy, but swallowing all those flies can't be good for the libido.
7. Anne Hathaway {although I did love her in Les Mis} - I don't really have a good reason to hate her {except that she has bags under her eyes}, so she's probably going to be removed from this list soon. Like, actually now. Except that I can't get the crossed-out-text thing to work, so this whole paragraph is now dumb.

8. Shia LaBeouf - He just annoys me. I can't get over Even Stevens and Holes.
9. John Travolta - He is a pretty good actor, I just hate his face a lot. Like a lot. I don't like to have to look at him.
10. Nicolas Cage - I don't think he can act.
11. Russel Brand - Disgusting. His face is disgusting, his voice is disgusting, his humor is disgusting. Even Katy Perry couldn't stay with him.
12. Samuel L. Jackson - He's the same obnoxious dead-eyed, smart-assed killjoy in every movie.

Actors/Actresses I Love
1. Jennifer Lawrence - I think she's a really good, nitty-gritty actress and she seems funny and down-to-earth.
2. Jennifer Garner - I don't think she's pretty at all, but she's a great actress.
3. Victor Garber - He's so convincing in whatever role he plays.
4. Leonardo DiCaprio - Incredibly talent. He has no limits. He's the opposite of Tom Cruise. DiCaprio fully commits to whatever character he plays, portraying them as a real person.
5. Ben Affleck - I really enjoy him. I think he's a good actor and I like his style.
6. Helena Bonham Carter - She's so quirky. And she's in, like, everything now.
7. Mark Ruffalo - Hm. I'm not sure why I like him. I definitely love his voice.
8. Jonah Hill - He's so funny and adorable XD
9.  Christoph Waltz - Seriously talented. Absolutely incredible. Him and Leonardo DiCaprio in a movie together was perfect {Django}.
10. Sandra Bullock - Great actress, very classy.

What about y'all? Are there actors/actresses you love or love to hate?


Monday, February 18, 2013

A Spinning World of Words

What if writing goes out of style? What if books become obsolete? What if one day, the last of the writers dies, and from then on, people just sit around and text and watch movies and talk? Maybe even handwriting will become extinct.

What if people forget how to write? What if imaginations get smaller and weaker until all people talk about are real events and the here-and-now?

What novels are put in display cases in museums and people look at their covers and think, “Someone made up stuff and stuck it together with words for fun. Who does that? How weird.”

But you know what? I doubt that will happen. A lot of things have come and gone, but stories, words, and sharing have never faded. They’ve been around since the beginning of time. Humans have an innate desire to remember, create, discover.

I can’t imagine a world where words aren’t valued by a single person. A world where everyone goes around throwing out words that are “close enough;” a world where no one gets chills when words are put in a painfully beautiful order.

I think someone will always be writing.

But how much can be said, really? There are many words, but so many people, so much time. Will we ever reach a point where everything has been said? Will there come a point where every combination of words, every pattern, has been penned?

I don’t think so, but if that time does come, I think it will be time for the world to end. To quietly fold on itself in satisfied darkness, like a blanket. Tender, gentle, crisp finality will settle over the earth. When everything has been said, thought, experienced, loved, trusted, written, mocked, taught, and pleaded, what else is left to live for?

The last written words would be like the final piece in a puzzle, or a dying man being forgiven, or laying down after a rough day.

Of course, if that time comes, it will be something new to write about, and someone will capture that moment and write it and keep the world spinning just a little bit longer.


Thursday, February 14, 2013

My Life in Songs

Something Beautiful ~ Childhood/fire fairies
            “It’s a voice that whispers my name.  It’s a kiss without any shame.  Like a song that turns in my head, singing love will take us where something’s beautiful.”

Such Great Heights ~ Us. March 2010.
            “I have to speculate that God himself did make us into corresponding shapes like puzzle pieces.”
Naturally ~ We’re perfect for each other. March 2010.
            “I love the way you know who you are, and to me it’s exciting.”
The Best Thing ~ Us. April 2010.
            “This is the best thing that could be happening, and I think you would agree the best thing is that it’s happening to you and me.”
Come Right Out and Say It ~ Us. July 2010.
            “Why don’t you come right out and say it?  Even if the words are probably going to hurt, I’d rather have the truth than something insincere.”
The Crow and the Butterfly ~ What? Do you want me or not? I’m not waiting forever. July 2010.
            “When you and I were getting high as outer space, I never thought you’d slip away.  I guess I was just a little too late.”
Get Back ~ I miss the way we were, and it kind of makes me angry. July-August 2010.
            “Hold me like you mean it, like you miss me, ‘cause I know that you do.”
Jar of Hearts ~ Broken heart. July-August 2010.
            “Who do you think you are, running around leaving scars?  Don’t come back for me.  Who do you think you are?”
Devastation and Reform ~ Wow. I guess I’ll always be a vulnerable dumbass. August 2010.
            “I feel like I was born for devastation and reform.  I destroy everything I love and the worst part is I’ll pull my heart out, reconstruct, but in the end it’s nothing but a shell of what I had when I first started.”
It’s Killing Me ~ I’m afraid one of my best friends is destroying himself. August 2010.
            “I want you to know that it’s killing me.  I think I’ve got to let go ’cause it’s killing me.  You’re gonna do what you want, but you better please believe it’s killing me.”
Easier to Run ~ My problem is pretty much crushing. Fall 2010.
            “If I could change, I would; take up the pain, I would; retrace every wrong move that I made, I would; if I could stand up and take the blame, I would; I would take all my shame to the grave.  It’s easier to run, replacing this pain with something numb.  It’s so much easier to go than face all this pain here all alone.”
Somebody that I Used to Know ~ It’s hard to believe we were once so close. October 2010.
            “You didn’t have to cut me off, make it like it never happened and that we were nothing.”
What I’ve Done ~ I have to face my problem and get over it. Winter 2010.
            “I’ll face myself to cross out what I’ve become.  Erase myself, and let go of what I’ve done.”
Undo ~ Good God. How have I become this? There’s no way I can overcome it. December 2010.
            “You’re the only one who can undo what I’ve become.”
For the Moment I Feel Faint ~ God can handle this, even when I can’t. December 2010.
            “Never underestimate my Jesus. You’re telling me that there’s no hope?  I’m telling you you’re wrong.”
What Have You Been Doing Lately? ~ Friends change, and sometimes it sucks. Winter 2010.
            “Pardon me while I throw up.  I guess some people never grow up.  What happened to the salvation you claimed?  It breaks my heart to see how much you’ve changed.”

The Lonely ~ I am okay. But there’s still a hole in my heart. January-March 2011.
            “Can the Lonely take the place of you?”
Hallelujah ~ Love is interesting. February 2011.
            “Love is not a victory march; it’s a cold and it’s a broken hallelujah.”
Who I Am Hates Who I’ve Been ~ I’m pulling it together and I am not going back. Early 2011.
            “I’m sorry it took so long for me to change.”
Snuff ~ I’m trying not to be bitter, because I really do—or at least did—love him. March 2011.
            “Love is just a camouflage for what resembles rage.  So if you love me let me go, and run away before I know.  My heart is just too dark to care.  I can’t destroy what isn’t there.  If I can change I hope I never know.  So save your breath, I will not care.  I think I’ve made it very clear.  I only wish you weren’t my friend; then I could hurt you in the end.”
Up and Up ~ I’ve got this. I can be happy, successful, and engaging again. Spring 2011.
            “I’m on the up and up,  there’s nothing left to prove.  I’m just trying to be a better version of me for you.”
The One I’m Waiting For ~ He wants me back, huh? Sucks for him XD May 2011.
            “The way that girl can turn a head, she is such a threat but don’t ever forget:  she knows it.  She’s so confident that she’s what everybody wants, but nobody wants her to know that.”
Wouldn’t Change a Thing ~ How come he’s the only one I’ve ever felt that way about? August 2011.
            “We’re like fire and rain.  You can drive me insane, but I can’t stay mad at you for anything.”
Dance with the Devil ~ I know him better than he realizes. October 2011.
            “It’s easy to find what’s wrong, harder to find what’s right.  I believe in you.  I can show you that I can see right through all your empty lies.”
Paradise ~ I don’t think I’m going to get into Wake Forest after all. November 2011.
            “When she was just a girl, she expected the world, but it flew away from her reach, so she ran away and asleep she dreams of paradise.”

No Light, No Light ~ I love him so much, but I don’t want to be with him that way. I am sorry. December 2011-January 2012.
            “You can’t choose what stays and what fades away, and I’d do anything to make you stay.  You want a revelation, you want to get back, but that’s a conversation I just can’t have tonight.  You want a revelation, some kind of resolution.  Tell me what you want me to say.  ’Cause it’s so easy to say it to a crowd, but it’s so hard to say it to you alone.”
How to Save a Life ~ I’d do just about anything for him, you know. March 2012.
            “I would have stayed up with you all night, had I known how to save a life.”
What Hurts the Most ~ I miss Ellie. March 2012.
            “What hurts the most is being so close, and having so much to say, and watching you walk away.”
Numb ~ God and I just no longer understand each other. Spring 2012.
            “I’ve become so numb I can’t feel you there.”
Breaking Inside ~ College, dating, going to Italy. It’s too much. April 2012.
            “It feels like I’m breaking inside.  I don’t want to fall and say I lost it all, ’cause maybe there’s a part of me that hit the wall, leaving pieces of me behind.”
Dismantle. Repair. ~ Italy, thinking about Sam. April 2012.
            “The night was young, and so were we.  We talked about life, God, death, and your family.  You didn’t want any promises, just my undivided honesty.  And you said ‘Things are gonna change now for the better.’ ”
It’s Not a Fashion Statement, It’s a Death Wish ~ There’s more to everything than I thought. June 2012.
            “Remember back then when we met, you told me this gets harder?  Well, it did.”
I’m Not Okay ~ I feel crazy and desperate and depressed. June 2012.
            “I never want to let you down or have you go.  It’s better off this way.  I’m not okay.”
Chasing Cars ~ I miss him so much. All I want to do is be in the same room as he is. August-September 2012.
            “If I lie here, would you lay with me and just forget the world?”
Must Have Done Something Right ~ The song says it all. Every word. November 2012.
            “We should get jerseys ‘cause we make a good team.  I know that it’s so cliché to talk about you this way, but I’ll put all my inhibitions aside.  Everyone watching us just turns away with disgust ‘cause jealously they can see that we’ve got it going on.”

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

~{To sit in solemn silence on a dull dark dock
In a pestilential prison with a lifelong lock
Awaiting the sensation of a short sharp shock
From a cheap and chippy chopper on a big black block.}~

 When I was in "Mulan," the director would make us recite this at the beginning of play practice until we were all enunciating properly. It got stuck in my head today and made me smile.

Good times.


Friday, February 1, 2013

Things I Can Do in Three Days

1. Drink half a gallon of chocolate milk
2. Journal thirty-six pages
3. Study sufficiently for a Western Civ II exam
4. Have two nightmares about the statistics test
5. Break the same New Year's resolution four times
6. Spend no money
7. Wear eleven different outfits
8. Learn three weeks worth of statistics information (well, we'll see how well I actually pulled that off.)
9. Have the same Imagine Dragons song stuck in my head ("Demons")