Thursday, October 11, 2012

The Me I Want to Be

I want to be a girl who can say a lot just by the way she walks. I want to walk with even steps and straight shoulders, fully engaged in the world around me. I want to make eye contact with strangers, and leave them feeling different after they look away.

I want to shrug off my hesitant tendencies and be myself with abandon. I want to embrace, to embody the mantra, "Those who mind, don't matter." I will be myself because the world needs me, and one else can do it for me.

I want to be so comfortable with myself that I inspire others to be genuine as well. I want to be a piece of people, so that they feel more whole when I'm around. I want to bring out the extrovert in everyone. I want to be the presence that flows into a group of acquaintances and melds them into a group of friends.

I want to be so original that people are constantly wondering what I'm going to do next. I want to be dared and be daring. I want to be the one people turn to when they hear the phrase, "But who would do that?" I want to be the one who can pull it off.

I want to say what I mean when I mean to say it. I want the perfect word to connect from my mind to my mouth. I want to use the right number of words and the right amount of time. I want to be eloquent and articulate without throwing people off. I want people to understand me the first time.

I want to listen to everything around me. I don't just want to hear what you said, I want to understand and internalize it. I don't just want to hear the doorbell ring, I want to be the one who gets up to answer it. I don't want to ignore anything, by accident or on purpose. I want to notice the world and engage it.

I want power in my eyes and joy in my laugh. I want to have a healthy soul. I want to be intensely real, yet refreshingly pleasant. I want to be strong without making others feel weak. I want to be intelligent without making others feel stupid. I want to be popular without making others feel inadequate.

I want people to wonder what makes me different. I want to be able to say that I found myself, and that I found myself in something bigger than us. I want my fingers to leave traces of God in the air. I want to be a bold person for a bold God. I want to be real. I want to be radical. I want to be revitalized.

This is the Me I want to be.

~Stephanie

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