Tuesday, September 3, 2013

One Percent

I wrote this randomly one afternoon in July. I like it, but I don't know what's going on yet.
“Are you okay?” Erika’s voice registered as irritated and impatient. The syllables assaulted my ears, causing a tender soreness that immediately engulfed my mind.

Sure, I was fine. Aside from the screeching pain in my head and the fact that my peripheral vision had turned to emptiness. Despite the panic rising tangibly in my being, I was fascinated by the vision loss. It wasn’t darkness closing in. It was like the world ceasing to exist, sinking into vague splotches of nothing.

“I’ll be right back,” I mumbled, pushing past my sister. “I’m fine; just one sec.”

I closed the door of the tiny hall bathroom behind me and crouched in front of the toilet taking deep, shaky breaths. I made my mouth into a small O and shut my eyes. That didn’t help. The sensation was disconcertingly similar to how the world was starting to look with my eyes open.

“They said this would happen,” I whispered evenly to myself. “99% certainty. If anything, this ought to make you feel more at ease. Everything is going according to plan. You’re fine. You’re fine.”

Elodie.” Erika’s voice slammed into me like a sack of flour: dull and heavy. I winced.

“Erika,” I returned. My voice still sounded strong, I noted with surprised satisfaction. “Can you just give me a moment of privacy? Is that honestly too much to ask?”

“Are you kidding me?” I could picture my sister with her hands on her hips and her left eyebrow peaking. “Look in the mirror and say that!”

A frown pinched at my nose. “I don’t think you’re using that accusation correctly. I always give you space when you ask.”

“No!” Erika cried. I heard the light slap of her giving her bare foot a stamp. “Literally, Elodie. Would you please just look at yourself?”

I snorted inwardly, which somehow sent a wave of nausea flowing over my core. I don’t know, would I look at myself? I wasn’t sure how much of my vision was left.

I opened my eyes a squinty amount, and found that I could see only the toilet and none of my surroundings.

“Seriously,” came Erika’s voice. She sounded breathy and nervous now. “I’m serious, Elodie. Look, if you haven’t already.”

At least I think that’s what she said. I know I heard some Erika Voice sounds, but I might have just manufactured the actual words. Everything was starting to feel very grainy and irrelevant. Nevertheless, I pushed my rubbery legs into a standing position and shuffled to the mirror without bending my knees. I gasped silently.

My skin was translucent purple and shrinking. It pulled at my eye sockets and mouth, giving me the look of a sour Asian beggar woman. Well, a purple one. It pulled so hard on my nose that I realized I was having trouble using it to breathe. I watched as my ears tucked themselves to my head and my forehead started to split.

This was not what they said would happen. This was not part of the plan.

My last thought was So this was the 1% chance


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