It's weird, having Pandora be over a year old, because now I'm running into holidays that I've already covered, and I'm like, "Well, hm, what'd I say last year?"
Last year, I was doing better than I had been for a while. God was helping me get through my problem and a good bit of personal drama.
This year, I'm slightly freaking out about where to go to college, but my personal life and masochism issues aren't plaguing me so much. Things are actually quite good, albeit terrifying {three more days of being a high-schooler, no big dea--HOLY SH'T, WHAT?}. But does that mean I need God less?
Um. No.
I'm super guilty of living my life that way, though. When times are bad, I run to God. When times get good, I put him on hold. "Yes, God, I know you have plans for me, and I'll be with you in just a minute, okay?"
What if we treated our friends that way?
Ooh. When I thought about it like that, it put things in perspective. Remember Ellie? My best friend who dropped off the face of the planet for about six months? She didn't have personal issues for me to help her with, so she didn't communicate with me at all. It hurt me, made me angry, and just plain wasn't fair. What a one-sided relationship!
Then you have God. He created a beautiful world for us to live in, and wanted us to live happily. But every day we choose to lie, steal, cheat, etc., and the penalty for that is eternal separation from him. But he loved us an amazing amount. So he took a part of himself, tore it from Heaven and flung it down on Earth to pay the price for us instead. God died so that we could live.
And yet I still forget to go to him when times are good.
This Easter, I want to remember that God died for me once and for all; he loves me every day; and he wants a personal connection with me. I'm not just one in a million to God. He would have died for me if I were the only person in the world. Same to you.
This post feels clinical and uninspired as I write it, so I might do a follow-up later. But I just want to say that God wants to be your best friend, your dad, your support, you encouragement, your kick in the ass, whatever you need. Not only do we owe him our attention, but once we give it to him, we'll begin to wonder why we ever thought spending time with him was a sacrifice.
Jesus loves me. Jesus loves you. And he thinks we're all to die for.
Happy Easter, guys.
~Stephanie
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