Monday, April 28, 2014

Fragments XII

- For me, one of the hardest things in the world is trying to do homework in the library basement. On one hand, it's quiet and studious and easy to concentrate. However, it's like I can hear the books around me breathing, whispering, listening, looking. It's like a thousand papery minds looking over my shoulders. I hear their thoughts and ideas murmuring around me and it is so damn difficult not to walk over and pick one up.

- PC texted me the other day, saying that if I ever needed anything, he would never ignore me. For the first time in months, I actually texted back, saying that I appreciated it and if he ever needed something specific from me, I'd do what I could. The irony? He ignored the text XD *adds nail to friendship coffin*

- Gerard told me that I can't go clubbing now that I have a boyfriend. Well, what he actually said was "I don't think your man would approve" when I suggested the two of us go out again.  Is he right? *sigh* Either he is, or it's one of those "It's-Different-For-Every-Couple-You'll-Have-To-Ask-Your-Boyfriend" things. I hate those things.

-The immediate difference in my mood once warm weather hits is astounding. Every year I'm surprised.

- I've had the song "Drop It Low" stuck in my head for probably five days now. I kind of like it. It gives me an unexplainable confidence.

- Is anyone else bewildered and disgusted by the slough of girls who love anchors because they symbolize refusal to sink in the storm of life? Do they not know what anchors do?

- Remember Yahoo!Avatars? I just now did. Good times. I used to spend way too long messing with my avatar's hair and clothes etc... I created an avatar for all the female characters in the Fire Fairy story. {I used to be kind of single-minded ;)}

- My Milton professor is still hot. {My family + Cassidy and I call him SMP:  Sexy Milton Professor.} I got to meet with him one-on-one the other day. His eyes are extremely blue and they sparkle. They actually. sparkle. And we interact like friends, bouncing off each other's ideas and amicably interrupting and getting these looks of excited inspiration. He's so young for a professor. But he has a son old enough to watch Sid the Science Kid. How old does that make him?

I am going to Google him. {...aaaaaaand that sounded so much more sexual than I intended.}

- He got his Ph.D. in 2011. So, graduate college at 22; two more years for master's degree would put him at 24; I'm gonna give him 4-6 years to get a Ph.D. Soooo, I can pretend with relative legitimacy that he might be under thirty.

Wait, NO. That would make him under thirty as of 2011. That was three years ago. Gah, he's like Jesus-Begins-Ministry aged now. *siiiiiiiiiiiiigh*

Not that ANY of this matters because he's married with a kid and I have negative a million genuine interest in ever being involved with a professor. But he's hot and I'm avoiding an international relations paper, so...yeah.

- Maybe a Pinterest pin called "50 Ways to Organize Every Room in Your House" fills some people with excitement, but it causes my eyes to widen in horror. I get overwhelmed by ice cream flavors, and that's a simple decision for immediate use. Don't even get me STARTED on things involving color.  "50 Ways" per hypothetical house room just sounds like a nightmare to me.

- I'm building up my tolerance of spicy food. It's already relatively high, but jalapenos can still pose a challenge if I eat a ton of them in a row. So I've taken to eating a ton of them in a row. I do like them.

- Gerard is definitely my best friend here at college. All the kind of "college moments" I expected to have as a child involve him. The midnight pizza runs, the talks by the fountain, the putting him between me and sketchy guys at clubs. You know last night we went to Raleigh and drove to the very top of a parking garage and got out of the car and just looked at the city. The night was mild and clear and breezy. We looked down at all the tiny people and talked about how funny it was that everyone had just as complete a backstory as us.

There were stars and city lights and the deepest feeling of mutual understanding I think I've ever felt. It was breathtakingly beautiful and almost a little confusing. We just stood there, perfectly comfortable, with our souls set quietly out in the open. I've been happy lots of times, but that night is a happiness I know I'll never forget.


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