Today I studied from 1:30pm to 9pm, with a break for dinner and a break for Wal-Mart. I did not finish what I set out to finish, but I'm calling it a freaking night. I have a quiz tomorrow in Western Civilization. We'll see if I need to be hardcore about this whole reading thing, or if I can lighten up.
*sigh*
I haven't really made friends yet, not that I've been trying much. I've kind of made three girl friends, and like two half-friends with guys.
Hollin - A friend of Emily's, who seems really cool. Dunno how she feels about me.
Raven - A friend of Kirsten's, who's fine. I mostly just know who she is.
Taylor (girl) - A girl on the first floor of my dorm. She's the only legitimate friend, really. I actually became friends her with all on my own, no connections. I like her a lot, but we haven't talked since like Tuesday.
Anthony - I like Anthony. He's nice, normal, Christian, writes, plays drums. I think he's the kind of safe, non-man-whore friend I'd like to have. But I haven't seen him since Tuesday either.
Brenden - The guy Rebekah grinded on at the Blacklight Dance. He talks to me sometimes, mostly just uses me to get to Rebekah. He's asked what my name is six times and still introduced me to someone as "Rebekah's friend." I kind of hate him a little bit.
I would like to make some really good friends. But I've forgotten how to make friends. I've never really HAD to make friends before. It's always been obvious and easy. I've pretty much had friends handed to me left and right my whole life.
Also, as much as I really do like Rebekah, I need some space. I can't make friends when she intercepts them all unintentionally.
I also need not to be so swamped in studying before I can make friends, because Stressed-Out Stephanie isn't all that charismatic.
Mom says I'll find the rhythm, that I won't always have to study so much. I'm not sure I buy that.
Dance try-outs are Tuesday. I'm planning to try out, not planning to make it. I'm not even sure if I WANT to. I have to study a lot, and if the dance team schedule is really intense, it might get in the way of going home. And that would not be okay with me.
~Stephanie
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Sunday, August 26, 2012
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