The Order of Events

I think about blogging in the shower a lot.

{That's not weird, is it.}

So the other day I was thinking about blogging in the shower, and I was like, "Hey, why don't I blog about taking a shower."

{That's not weird either. At all. In the slightest.}

I'm a routine person. I like structure and predictability. {This is just everyday life, mind you, I love risk and surprises too. At least safe, predictable ones. [Just kidding.] Ack, I'm in another Mood.}

So, whether I did it on purpose or not, I have a very strict Shower Routine.

I take showers at night, usually around 8:30, unless it's a Wednesday and then I'm at dance. So then it's around 9:37.

Preparation: Grab pajamas, underwear, iHome, and iPod, unless I'm in a radio mood. Then nix the iPod.

Realize I forgot socks.

Go get socks.

Turn on the water.

Examine the shower area for spiders and other bugs.

If I'm Listing to the Radio: Choose a station.

If I'm Listening to my iPod: Agonize over what songs I feel like listening to. Can I use an existing playlist? New Playlist 2 looks good, but I hate that one stupid song. Why is it even on there? Should I need to create an On the Go? That might take a while. The water is running. What about Shuffle? No, too many chances of running into the classical music I had to study in 10th grade.

Etc.

Once I've gotten the music figured out...

Brush out my hair so it's not tangled when I try to wash it. It's getting long again.

Think about whether or not I should cut it. I like long hair, but too long and it looks bad. How long is too long? {<-- really bad unintended innuendo.}

Undress. {I'm so provocative. Haha. Not really.}

Pull the little knob that transfers the water from the spigot to the shower head.

Get in the shower.

Stand under the water like I have no regard for the utilities bill.

Wash my face and think about how awful it'll be if I break out because I don't want to look like a pepperoni pizza for Easter, thanks.

Wash my body and tell myself I have to remember to get more bodywash because it's almost gone.

Forget completely about the bodywash.

Gripe about the song that's playing and wonder what I was thinking in selecting it.

Squeeze out shampoo into my hand. The bottle says a quarter size. I'm pretty sure no one does that. I usually go with large-Gatorade-bottle-cap-size.

Lather.

Rinse.

Try not to worry that I'll go bald because a disturbing number of hairs just kind of fall out.

Condition. First I put conditioner in the top part of my hair, the roots and stuff. Then I do the middle and tips. Because I'm afraid my hair will get ugly and fried and no one will love me. >sadface<

***CHANGE IN ORDER.*** I used to rinse the conditioner out right here, but my friend Emma said she shaves her legs while the conditioner stays in. It's supposed to make your hair healthier.

...

So I was like "We'll see about that" and tried it. Aaaand my hair got softer. Or maybe it was just the power of suggestion. Whatever. Either way, I now shave next instead of rinsing right away. So...

Shave my legs, avoiding all the weird scratches I don't know how I got, paying special attention to the ankle area because it annoys me when I miss like four hairs there.

Rinse the razor.

Rinse the conditioner out.

Turn off the water.

Wring out my hair.

Grab a towel and dry off in the shower.

Get out of the shower.

Turn down the music because it's freaking LOUD now that I don't have the water running in my ears.

Put my hair up in my designated Hair Towel.

Get dressed.

Hang up my towel.

Remove remaining makeup stains that the shower didn't get rid of with a makeup cloth.

Hang up my hair towel.

Put in leave-in conditioner.

Sometimes I part and comb my hair, sometimes I don't. It depends on how it's starting to look. My hair has a mind of its own.

Put on face moisturizer.

Pick up the socks that I never actually put on, grab my dirty clothes, turn off my iHome, unplug my iHome, pick up my iHome and carry everything out and back downstairs where it belongs.

I'm a freak and I realize that, but surely I'm not the absolute ONLY one with a shower routine.

Am I?

~Stephanie