It's weird because my friends and I have all been in the Single Boat as long as we've known each other, at least most of the time. Now some of them are leaving to board other boats, which range from the Level-Headed Cruise to the Head-Over-Heels Canoe to the Barge of Giggles.
The Single Boat isn't lonely, which might be what you were expecting me to say. For the most part, I don't mind. I mean, there are times when it bothers me not to have anyone, but on a day-to-day basis I'm perfectly fine with it. {Better single than sorry, right? XD}
No, the hardest part of watching my friends get into relationships is knowing how to deal with them now. There's always the classic third wheel issue, but my biggest problem is this:
I can be a real cynic. My knee-jerk reactions to relationship slobber are things you ought never say out loud, at least not right away.
"I love him!" ------> No, you don't.
"The good outweighs the bad." ------> If you have to say it like that, it's not true.
"We're gonna be together forever :)" ------> Really? I give it four months.
"I thank God for giving me such a perfect guy :)" ------> I thank God I'm not this dumb.
"I know ALL ABOUT relationships now." ------> Are you really that naive?
"He says he'll never do it again." ------> He's a liar.
I wasn't always like this, at least not to this degree, and I don't think it's the best way to be.
There is a balance between the mushy naivety I see in some of my friends and the cold-hearted cynicism I live by. Unfortunately, I have yet to move to that neighborhood of happy medium, probably because deep down I still think I'm right.
No, not every relationship is doomed to fail, but I actually believe most high school ones ARE. Yes, some people do find their soul mates in high school. My awesome dance teacher is walking proof of that. She and her husband have only ever dated each other, and they are a great and happily-married couple. But the reality is that that happens to less than 2% of high school sweethearts.
I believe high school relationships are mostly about getting over the initial dating ineptitude that plagues adolescence. They are about having fun and maybe learning how to kiss someone. They can be deep and meaningful, but even if they are does not mean it will last forever. The odds are very much NOT in young love's favor. {Hunger Games <3}
Because of all this, I prefer to think I'm just being realistic when it comes to teenage love. And maybe sometimes I am. But the knee-jerk cynical reactions to romance are not all well and good. Something needs to change in me. I guess I'll work on it, but honestly being cynical is easier than being hurt XD
For now I shall simply try to restrain myself from vomiting during chick-flick kissing scenes.
Hey, baby steps, alright?
~Stephanie
You have maturity beyond your age because some of the thoughts you mention are ones usually reserved for people say ten years out of high school. It's unwise for some to say their relationship will last forever when they're still riding the Barge of Giggles. Your cynicism, if you want to call it that, at least keeps you from running into relationships that will get you hurt. That being said, I bet you, yes even YOU will ride the Barge of Giggles when the right guys comes along.
ReplyDelete2% seems a bit high to me:D I have known 2 couples who were together through high school and lasted. One is a friend's parents who were together since they were 12 and 14, and were together until he died. Second couple is getting married in another couple of months, fingers crossed for them. But yeah, most relationships are not forever. Most people do not marry the first person they kiss. And I don't think it is cynical but realistic. In the (puke) face of mushiness it can be so over the top. A couple of your examples are the bullshit of someone wanting ANYONE, even an asshole rather than being alone. Single is far better than being tied up in a doomed relationship.
ReplyDeleteAs for "He'll never do it again" yes, yes he will. Because he did it once, and you already taught him he will be forgiven.
"The good outweighs the bad" *shudder*
Jay: Well thank you :) I agree, even though I wish I weren't so cynical sometimes.
ReplyDelete*sigh* You're right. I'll be right there with the giggliest of them, I'm sure.
Jamie: Well, I only Googled it, so I can't be certain the statistic is legit :)
That's great that a few of your friends are marrying highschool sweethearts. It's great when it happens, you just don't see it much. *sigh*
Agreed. I wish people would stop being so naive because they're afraid of being alone. Good grief.
~Stephanie
There's a difference between cynicism and wisdom. People who are cynical think they're wise, and wise people question themselves often enough to pointedly wonder if they're just being cynical.
ReplyDeleteYou're the latter.
:) Thanks, Aaron.
ReplyDelete~Stephanie